There is no question that Lebron James is a great basketball player and he's kinda hot too. Wade and Bosh have tremendous talent as well...although Bosh looks the love child of Snoop Dog and JJ from Good Times, bless his heart. But the three of them are AMAZING basketball players. Anyone who says differently is most likely jealous or not paying attention.
All that said, I don't care. I'm a Mavs fan and I believe that a gaggle of old men playing with heart can overcome the most talented group of prime players put together in many years. This goes back to a recurring theme of my blog...it is not enough to WANT it. You have to MAKE it happen with whatever tools you have at your disposal.
Dirk, Kidd, JJ, Chandler (hot!!), Jet...they are talented, but not one of them (even Dirk) alone could measure up to Lebron. But that is the fabulous thing about team sports. It is not about individual talent, but about the cohesiveness of the team. It is about each player doing their best and filling in the holes of their teammates. It's about lifting each other up and motivating each other to do better.
If the Heat wins the Championship, they will have deserved it and I give them kudos. But a Mavs win would be so much more satisfying, yet no less deserved. You can stack your deck with everything you need to win, but if you don't have the right support around you, it just isn't going to be as satisfying.
I feel the same way about my journey. Someone out there might be the perfect dieter, perfect fitness beast, perfect band patient. But if they are doing it alone, I can not imagine that they have the same satisfaction that I have working with my team. My little world of Bloggers lifts me up when I'm down and fills in the missing pieces. You all are such a big part of my team!
Go Mavs!!
Hugs!
Ladybug
Friday, June 10, 2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Fighting the Scale Whore Inside Me
Most days I talk to my mom during my commute. The last two morning we have been discussing how weight loss and the scale fit into our lives. I have been fascinated with Leslie over at Band Sweet Band's Scale Whore Challenge and her discussion of how her relationship with her scale is making her feel. I brought that up to my mom yesterday and she immediately said that she would never stop weighing every day. She said that is how she has always been and she is too old to change now. My first thought was "Really, mom? C'mon now." [I have always been annoyed with anyone responding that they are unable or unwilling to change...both in my personal and work life. I mean, you may not NEED to change, but to cut off your nose to spite your face just because you don't WANT to change, drives my batty!]
But I completely understand the emotions behind where she is coming from. My entire life (at least from about fourth grade on), every decision, every choice, everything has somehow been about my weight with me. I remember distinctly one girl in my school in fourth grade calling me Buffalo Butt all the time. It was horrifying. I think from that point on, my parents were involved in my "diet". I remember going out to eat and not being able to get french fries when my brother could (even though it is very possible that my parents didn't really make that restriction), I just thought they did. Honestly, I don't know...I just know it was how I saw it. Around fourth grade is when I started hiding food and eating in secret.
In High School I went to Weight Watchers with my mom and my parents also paid for me to go to Nutri System. To them, I'm sure I was enthusiastic because I was, in that I wanted to lose weight. During all of my diets, I would do what I was supposed to do in public, but in private I would hide and hoard food. When I went away to college, it was all over. I ate WHATEVER I wanted WHENEVER I wanted. Plus, I started drinking...nothing like adding empty calories!! The first three years, my weight was kept somewhat under control (although I did gain about 15-20 pounds during that time), because I walked a lot on campus and lived in a FOUR story walk up for a couple of years. My senior year, I moved off campus and started driving everywhere. I gained about 40-50 pounds that year. I hated myself.
As an adult, I have always actively been on a diet or not been on a diet. Meaning that if I wasn't dieting, it was a conscious choice. Either I weighed every day because I was being "good" or I wasn't weighing at all because I was being "bad". I have always assumed how people treated me was because of my weight which I KNOW now was not always true.
When I consider, truly consider, not weighing myself every day, I start feeling physical signs of panic. My stomach starts to get sick, I get hot and my body starts to get a little numb. Seriously. Now how freaking ridiculous is that? But it is true.
When I honestly analyze my relationship with the scale, I think it is my security blanket. Those times I haven't weighed, it was because I was out of control and gaining a lot of weight. I'm scared now that if I CHOOSE to not weigh, I will gain a lot of weight. I also think that right now, I use the scale as an excuse to make bad choices. If I am down, then a treat won't hurt. If I'm up, I don't have the treat. If I don't have the security of knowing...how will I know if I deserve a treat? [Yes, I realize how that sounds as well. Ugh.]
Instead, I just need to move forward with good choices. Don't get me wrong, there is never a time I see myself eating perfectly, but that's okay. I want to envision a life where weight is something that is in the back of my mind because I need to stay healthy, but it doesn't rule my life. I honestly can't envision that right now.
So here is my baby step plan. I will weigh next Monday morning to start my Balls to the Wall/10 Days to Vegas Challenge with Debi. I will weigh on Saturday morning, 6/18 and I will weight on the morning of 6/23 when I leave for Vegas. Today, I weigh the same as I did around the end of March. That is over two months of plateau. It is NOT because my body is fighting weight loss. It is because I'm sabotaging myself.
I know that for those of you that aren't a slave to the scale, this is all nutso. But honestly, I'm more terrified of this, than I am of my CrossFit class on Saturday.
I just read through this post and it kind of sounds sad. It's not! If I were coming from a place of depression and sadness, I would not be able to face my fears this way. I'm coming from a place of happiness, determination and conviction. Let's fight the fight!!
HUGS!
But I completely understand the emotions behind where she is coming from. My entire life (at least from about fourth grade on), every decision, every choice, everything has somehow been about my weight with me. I remember distinctly one girl in my school in fourth grade calling me Buffalo Butt all the time. It was horrifying. I think from that point on, my parents were involved in my "diet". I remember going out to eat and not being able to get french fries when my brother could (even though it is very possible that my parents didn't really make that restriction), I just thought they did. Honestly, I don't know...I just know it was how I saw it. Around fourth grade is when I started hiding food and eating in secret.
In High School I went to Weight Watchers with my mom and my parents also paid for me to go to Nutri System. To them, I'm sure I was enthusiastic because I was, in that I wanted to lose weight. During all of my diets, I would do what I was supposed to do in public, but in private I would hide and hoard food. When I went away to college, it was all over. I ate WHATEVER I wanted WHENEVER I wanted. Plus, I started drinking...nothing like adding empty calories!! The first three years, my weight was kept somewhat under control (although I did gain about 15-20 pounds during that time), because I walked a lot on campus and lived in a FOUR story walk up for a couple of years. My senior year, I moved off campus and started driving everywhere. I gained about 40-50 pounds that year. I hated myself.
As an adult, I have always actively been on a diet or not been on a diet. Meaning that if I wasn't dieting, it was a conscious choice. Either I weighed every day because I was being "good" or I wasn't weighing at all because I was being "bad". I have always assumed how people treated me was because of my weight which I KNOW now was not always true.
When I consider, truly consider, not weighing myself every day, I start feeling physical signs of panic. My stomach starts to get sick, I get hot and my body starts to get a little numb. Seriously. Now how freaking ridiculous is that? But it is true.
When I honestly analyze my relationship with the scale, I think it is my security blanket. Those times I haven't weighed, it was because I was out of control and gaining a lot of weight. I'm scared now that if I CHOOSE to not weigh, I will gain a lot of weight. I also think that right now, I use the scale as an excuse to make bad choices. If I am down, then a treat won't hurt. If I'm up, I don't have the treat. If I don't have the security of knowing...how will I know if I deserve a treat? [Yes, I realize how that sounds as well. Ugh.]
Instead, I just need to move forward with good choices. Don't get me wrong, there is never a time I see myself eating perfectly, but that's okay. I want to envision a life where weight is something that is in the back of my mind because I need to stay healthy, but it doesn't rule my life. I honestly can't envision that right now.
So here is my baby step plan. I will weigh next Monday morning to start my Balls to the Wall/10 Days to Vegas Challenge with Debi. I will weigh on Saturday morning, 6/18 and I will weight on the morning of 6/23 when I leave for Vegas. Today, I weigh the same as I did around the end of March. That is over two months of plateau. It is NOT because my body is fighting weight loss. It is because I'm sabotaging myself.
I know that for those of you that aren't a slave to the scale, this is all nutso. But honestly, I'm more terrified of this, than I am of my CrossFit class on Saturday.
I just read through this post and it kind of sounds sad. It's not! If I were coming from a place of depression and sadness, I would not be able to face my fears this way. I'm coming from a place of happiness, determination and conviction. Let's fight the fight!!
HUGS!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Today is NOT my birthday.
Birthday
So, today it is no longer my birthday. I'm not sure why yesterday was so magically great, but it was. After I posted yesterday, my friends at work took me out to lunch at Ziziki's and it was delicious. I asked for 1/2 chicken and 1/2 lamb souvlaki. It turned out that it was really hard to eat the lamb, so I only ate about 1/2 of one piece and then at the chicken. I also ate the potatoes and greek pico (I don't know what it was but it tasted like Greek spiced pico de gallo) and left the pita bread. Not too bad as far as choices go and it was absolutely delish! My boss ended up picking up the tab for everyone which was unexpected and really nice.
After lunch I treated myself to a second cup of coffee for the day and a few cookies from the box that one of our law firms sent me for my birthday. I left work slightly early to make it to the early Jazzercise class. I was subbing for someone that had Ranger tickets and I didn't mind. I even signed up two new people...yay!! The magic continued because I could have worked out all night. I was giving everything and I did not feel overwhelmed. Just good!
After Jazzercise and tanning, BFF & I went for some frozen custard. I was going to post a picture of this big, ginormous sundae I had for dinner, but a modicum of common sense won out and I ended up with a regular size sundae with hot fudge, caramel & whipped cream. I'm sure it still had at least 1000 calories, but still. Then the Mavs go and win which is just stellar!
All in all, definitely one of the best birthdays ever! However today, it is no more. I'm still in a GREAT mood, but more subdued (which is probably a good thing...wouldn't want to burst!)
Water
This morning, (since it is not my magical birthday) my normally 30 minute commute took an hour and ten minutes. Yikes. The silver lining is that I actually drank my whole bottle of Smart Water before I got to work. Additionally, since I have been here, I drank a cup of coffee AND another bottle of water. I really do think that my tightness somehow kept me from drinking the amount of water I needed. I don't know why or how to explain that, but I think it is true. I just feel SO much better since my unfill and I'm not starving!
My Job
Reason #734 Why I Love My Boss
Boss: Does Property X have any cash?
Me: As of 5/31, they had $7.
Boss: As in 700 pennies?
Me: 70 dimes, yes.
Boss: So what you are saying is, it has only 140 nickels?
Me: 28 quarters...yeppers.
Boss: So I want to make sure I understand...a Lincoln and 2 Washingtons? Clearly they are broke...
Me: You are correct on both counts, sir.
I know I'm a complete nerd, but it is conversations like that with a guy I could not possibly respect more that is one of the top reasons why I have come to the same place for work every day for over thirteen years.
Today (not my birthday)
I had planned to Jazzercise tonight, but then I remembered that Godmother & I are walking at lunch today. So, my new plan is to run home and do a couple of items that have to be done by 8pm. Then I'm either going to go to DSW to go shoe shopping or I'm going to the mall. I have $65 in gift cards at DSW, $75 at Nordstrom, & $50 at Macy's. I would like to have some time to unwind at home tonight and go to bed early after staying up for the Mavs game...after all, I will be up late on Thursday for the next one! So, I don't think I will go everywhere.
Whatever I don't do, I will need to try to go to this weekend. I would REALLY like to get a couple of new splurge items for the Vegas and Long Beach. So wish me luck on finding something hot and sexy!! :)
Hugs!
So, today it is no longer my birthday. I'm not sure why yesterday was so magically great, but it was. After I posted yesterday, my friends at work took me out to lunch at Ziziki's and it was delicious. I asked for 1/2 chicken and 1/2 lamb souvlaki. It turned out that it was really hard to eat the lamb, so I only ate about 1/2 of one piece and then at the chicken. I also ate the potatoes and greek pico (I don't know what it was but it tasted like Greek spiced pico de gallo) and left the pita bread. Not too bad as far as choices go and it was absolutely delish! My boss ended up picking up the tab for everyone which was unexpected and really nice.
After lunch I treated myself to a second cup of coffee for the day and a few cookies from the box that one of our law firms sent me for my birthday. I left work slightly early to make it to the early Jazzercise class. I was subbing for someone that had Ranger tickets and I didn't mind. I even signed up two new people...yay!! The magic continued because I could have worked out all night. I was giving everything and I did not feel overwhelmed. Just good!
After Jazzercise and tanning, BFF & I went for some frozen custard. I was going to post a picture of this big, ginormous sundae I had for dinner, but a modicum of common sense won out and I ended up with a regular size sundae with hot fudge, caramel & whipped cream. I'm sure it still had at least 1000 calories, but still. Then the Mavs go and win which is just stellar!
All in all, definitely one of the best birthdays ever! However today, it is no more. I'm still in a GREAT mood, but more subdued (which is probably a good thing...wouldn't want to burst!)
Water
This morning, (since it is not my magical birthday) my normally 30 minute commute took an hour and ten minutes. Yikes. The silver lining is that I actually drank my whole bottle of Smart Water before I got to work. Additionally, since I have been here, I drank a cup of coffee AND another bottle of water. I really do think that my tightness somehow kept me from drinking the amount of water I needed. I don't know why or how to explain that, but I think it is true. I just feel SO much better since my unfill and I'm not starving!
My Job
Reason #734 Why I Love My Boss
Boss: Does Property X have any cash?
Me: As of 5/31, they had $7.
Boss: As in 700 pennies?
Me: 70 dimes, yes.
Boss: So what you are saying is, it has only 140 nickels?
Me: 28 quarters...yeppers.
Boss: So I want to make sure I understand...a Lincoln and 2 Washingtons? Clearly they are broke...
Me: You are correct on both counts, sir.
I know I'm a complete nerd, but it is conversations like that with a guy I could not possibly respect more that is one of the top reasons why I have come to the same place for work every day for over thirteen years.
Today (not my birthday)
I had planned to Jazzercise tonight, but then I remembered that Godmother & I are walking at lunch today. So, my new plan is to run home and do a couple of items that have to be done by 8pm. Then I'm either going to go to DSW to go shoe shopping or I'm going to the mall. I have $65 in gift cards at DSW, $75 at Nordstrom, & $50 at Macy's. I would like to have some time to unwind at home tonight and go to bed early after staying up for the Mavs game...after all, I will be up late on Thursday for the next one! So, I don't think I will go everywhere.
Whatever I don't do, I will need to try to go to this weekend. I would REALLY like to get a couple of new splurge items for the Vegas and Long Beach. So wish me luck on finding something hot and sexy!! :)
Hugs!
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Today 37 is my lucky number!!
Today is my birthday. I woke up to little pings on my phone telling my I have Facebook messages. Everyone should have a Facebook account for the sheer pleasure of having it on your birthday. :) I know not everyone agrees, but I find it absolutely delightful!
My mama & dad wished me a happy birthday this morning. Wait...I don't think my dad actually wished me a happy birthday. He probably doesn't love me anymore. Or he loves my brother more than he loves me. Sidenote: he used to tell us that ALL THE TIME growing up. BUT he would tell us both equally. If I was whining because Big Bro got to do something, dad would say "that's because I love him more than I love you" and he would do the same to Big Bro when he was whining about me. Bystanders were appalled, but we knew he was full of it and loved us both tremendously. It was genius!
Anyway, I got to work and as a birthday gift to me, one of the girls who works for me wore a dress...I'm pretty sure for the first time ever to work. How awesome is that?? Then my godmother (did I mention that I work with so many of my closest friends?) gave me a sweet, sweet card.
I walked over to BFFs desk to ask her how she likes the new coffee I brewed (Sidenote #2: we cold brew our coffee each week and bring it to work. Not sure if you have ever had it, but I like it better than regular coffee. Each week we have a different kind.) since it was a new kind we picked up during our trip to Granbury a couple weeks ago. She handed me a James Avery bag and told me happy birthday. Nothing bad EVER comes in a James Avery bag!!
Isn't it cute?! You all should know by now how much I love volleyball and specifically, the Men's USA Volleyball team. I didn't have a necklace on today, otherwise, I would totally be wearing it!
THEN...Lizard came in with this...
And a card from her and the rest of my Dinner Group that had gift cards to DSW and Macy's. I think I told you all that I got a Nordstrom gift card from some of my friends on Saturday. Plus, I got birthday coupons from DSW in the mail last week. I would LOVE to go buy a couple of rocking shirts and shoes for my Vegas and Long Beach trips. I just have no idea when I'm going to go!!
At lunch we are going to go to Ziziki's which is one of my favorite restaurants ever. YAY! Then tonight, I'm going to the early Jazzercise class. After I'm meeting up with BFF & Lizard to go get a giant birthday sundae!!
I don't know if you all can tell, but I'm about to jump out of my own skin because of pure happiness. Not because of all the gifts...I mean those are awesome without a doubt! But just because I'm happy and I have the best family and friends and most of all because I'm in control of my life.
Last year, I didn't celebrate my birthday much. I think we went out to lunch and that is about it. Oh and I remember my Dinner Group friends brought me a piece of keylime pie. :) I was on the road to happiness, but I wasn't ready to make a pitstop then. Now? Now, I just want to live. I want to do. I want to see. I want to make out with a boy! (Not sure yet when that is going to happen, but I will be ready for it!! :)) I'm sitting here looking at my calendar for June and for the rest of the month, there are only 8 days with nothing written on it...well, I have Jazzercised penciled in on those days, but nothing else.
Frankly, it looks exhausting, but it also looks like happiness!
I hope you all have a Happy My Birthday! :)
Hugs!
My mama & dad wished me a happy birthday this morning. Wait...I don't think my dad actually wished me a happy birthday. He probably doesn't love me anymore. Or he loves my brother more than he loves me. Sidenote: he used to tell us that ALL THE TIME growing up. BUT he would tell us both equally. If I was whining because Big Bro got to do something, dad would say "that's because I love him more than I love you" and he would do the same to Big Bro when he was whining about me. Bystanders were appalled, but we knew he was full of it and loved us both tremendously. It was genius!
Anyway, I got to work and as a birthday gift to me, one of the girls who works for me wore a dress...I'm pretty sure for the first time ever to work. How awesome is that?? Then my godmother (did I mention that I work with so many of my closest friends?) gave me a sweet, sweet card.
I walked over to BFFs desk to ask her how she likes the new coffee I brewed (Sidenote #2: we cold brew our coffee each week and bring it to work. Not sure if you have ever had it, but I like it better than regular coffee. Each week we have a different kind.) since it was a new kind we picked up during our trip to Granbury a couple weeks ago. She handed me a James Avery bag and told me happy birthday. Nothing bad EVER comes in a James Avery bag!!
THEN...Lizard came in with this...
At lunch we are going to go to Ziziki's which is one of my favorite restaurants ever. YAY! Then tonight, I'm going to the early Jazzercise class. After I'm meeting up with BFF & Lizard to go get a giant birthday sundae!!
I don't know if you all can tell, but I'm about to jump out of my own skin because of pure happiness. Not because of all the gifts...I mean those are awesome without a doubt! But just because I'm happy and I have the best family and friends and most of all because I'm in control of my life.
Last year, I didn't celebrate my birthday much. I think we went out to lunch and that is about it. Oh and I remember my Dinner Group friends brought me a piece of keylime pie. :) I was on the road to happiness, but I wasn't ready to make a pitstop then. Now? Now, I just want to live. I want to do. I want to see. I want to make out with a boy! (Not sure yet when that is going to happen, but I will be ready for it!! :)) I'm sitting here looking at my calendar for June and for the rest of the month, there are only 8 days with nothing written on it...well, I have Jazzercised penciled in on those days, but nothing else.
Frankly, it looks exhausting, but it also looks like happiness!
I hope you all have a Happy My Birthday! :)
Hugs!
Monday, June 6, 2011
BOOBs & my Band
Yes, I know I posted earlier. But I decided I have more to say!
BOOBs
I made sure I was following all the blogs of the lovely ladies going to Chicago in the Fall. I realized that there are people that follow me that I FEEL LIKE ARE MY FRIENDS, that I wasn't following myself. Bad Beth Ann! I don't know if I didn't realize they had blogs or what, but yikes! I'm so sorry girls, but that has been rectified and I cannot wait to catch up!
My super roomie Kerri and I have been emailing back and forth a lot to get to know each other. Kerri suggested doing 20 questions and I LOVED the idea. So, I started by asking (and answering myself) 5 questions. Then she responded by answering those questions and asking five more. We have been doing that back and forth for a while and I feel like I know her better than ever! I highly suggest it for anyone that is rooming with someone new. Anyhoo...I heart my roomie!! I can't wait to meet the rest of you. What a fun time we are going to have!!
My Band
Listen to your body, people. I say that as someone who has trouble listening to my own advice. Just a couple weeks ago, I was thinking of getting a fill. A couple of nights of slight acid reflux made me rethink it. I can eat almost whatever (bread, etc.) and I don't really have stuck issues. So, when I started full on acid reflux (like sore throat and feeling like I just ate three hours after a meal) a week or so ago, I couldn't imagine that it was band related. I mean, I get hungry a lot...how could it be my band?
But I KNOW that acid reflux means your band it too tight. I also know that there is a part of me that is scared that I will gain weight. But doing the right thing for your band and therefore your body is the right place to start. As I was explaining my symptoms to the doc, she was nodding. I told her that I didn't have any right now, but mostly at night. However, as soon as she took some out (and it was only a tenth of a cc, so hardly any at all) and I felt some relief. Apparently, I got so used to it that I didn't realize that I was having it until it was gone. Beth Ann...for shame, for shame.
Anyway, I can't tell for sure what effect it will have on my hunger, but I know that all I have had today is a cup of coffee and a right-size frozen dinner (sometimes efficiency wins out) and I'm satisifed. In an hour, I'm going to try and drink water. I think that perhaps (and it is something I'm going to watch) I wasn't getting my water in because I was too tight to drink it properly. Don't know for sure.
Anyway, I'm mad at myself for not taking the time to go earlier. But I am glad that I listened to my body in the end. These are the kind of things if not addressed, could have long term consequenses. I don't want to sabotage myself!!
I just wanted to put this out there in case anyone is on the fence. If you are having acid reflux, go to your doc. They will make it better and it doesn't mean you will walk out starving. Listen to your body!! (That means you, Beth Ann!)
Hugs!
BOOBs
I made sure I was following all the blogs of the lovely ladies going to Chicago in the Fall. I realized that there are people that follow me that I FEEL LIKE ARE MY FRIENDS, that I wasn't following myself. Bad Beth Ann! I don't know if I didn't realize they had blogs or what, but yikes! I'm so sorry girls, but that has been rectified and I cannot wait to catch up!
My super roomie Kerri and I have been emailing back and forth a lot to get to know each other. Kerri suggested doing 20 questions and I LOVED the idea. So, I started by asking (and answering myself) 5 questions. Then she responded by answering those questions and asking five more. We have been doing that back and forth for a while and I feel like I know her better than ever! I highly suggest it for anyone that is rooming with someone new. Anyhoo...I heart my roomie!! I can't wait to meet the rest of you. What a fun time we are going to have!!
My Band
Listen to your body, people. I say that as someone who has trouble listening to my own advice. Just a couple weeks ago, I was thinking of getting a fill. A couple of nights of slight acid reflux made me rethink it. I can eat almost whatever (bread, etc.) and I don't really have stuck issues. So, when I started full on acid reflux (like sore throat and feeling like I just ate three hours after a meal) a week or so ago, I couldn't imagine that it was band related. I mean, I get hungry a lot...how could it be my band?
But I KNOW that acid reflux means your band it too tight. I also know that there is a part of me that is scared that I will gain weight. But doing the right thing for your band and therefore your body is the right place to start. As I was explaining my symptoms to the doc, she was nodding. I told her that I didn't have any right now, but mostly at night. However, as soon as she took some out (and it was only a tenth of a cc, so hardly any at all) and I felt some relief. Apparently, I got so used to it that I didn't realize that I was having it until it was gone. Beth Ann...for shame, for shame.
Anyway, I can't tell for sure what effect it will have on my hunger, but I know that all I have had today is a cup of coffee and a right-size frozen dinner (sometimes efficiency wins out) and I'm satisifed. In an hour, I'm going to try and drink water. I think that perhaps (and it is something I'm going to watch) I wasn't getting my water in because I was too tight to drink it properly. Don't know for sure.
Anyway, I'm mad at myself for not taking the time to go earlier. But I am glad that I listened to my body in the end. These are the kind of things if not addressed, could have long term consequenses. I don't want to sabotage myself!!
I just wanted to put this out there in case anyone is on the fence. If you are having acid reflux, go to your doc. They will make it better and it doesn't mean you will walk out starving. Listen to your body!! (That means you, Beth Ann!)
Hugs!
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