Weekly Check-In

Weekly Check-In

Loss this week - 1.6 pounds
Total Loss since revision - 27.2 pounds
Total Loss from highest - 73.2 pounds

I'm always happy when things are going in the right direction. With the addition of new foods, I expected a slow down. I hope to boost my metabolism a little more this week.

The best news is that the pain is gone!!! I can actually even sneeze without pain. It is joyous!

Nutrition

I can't say that I'm a big fan of the pureed food stage. I'm happy to be getting savory flavors though, for sure. Plus, there is only one more week until I can move to soft foods. After everything I have gone through, that is totally doable.

For breakfasts this week, I have Egg Beaters. For my protein power-ups, I have shakes (although I have a couple of Greek yogurts to mix things up.) For lunches, I have my cottage cheese/marinara concoction. And finally for dinners, I'm enjoying the soup my dad made and left in my freezer.

A few of things I'm learning:

• I'm getting a slightly more normal appetite back which is great. 
• It's easier to eat thicker things as the day goes on.
• I really don't love pureed soups and can't wait until next week when I can enjoy them as is!

 Fitness

 Even though I no longer have pain, my abs are still sore. I carried something up the stairs yesterday and could feel the tightness. It is probably good that I still have 2-3 weeks before I can go back to Jazzercise, but I'm ready to start walking in earnest. My goal is at least 3 days at lunch this week and then on Saturday morning. Hold me to it!

Other

I don't have a lot on my plate this week other than work. Work is a bit crazy busy (in a good way) so I can take time to really dig in there. Additionally, I can get a few more things done around home. I did a lot of purging when my parents were visiting. I'm continuing that trend.

I tried on every Spring & Summer item in my closets this weekend. If it was too big or I didn't love it, it went in the "give away" pile. If it fit, it went back in the closet. If it was damaged, it went in the trash. If it was more Fall/Winter, it went in the guest room closet. I filled 2 garbage bags already!! I'm still about 20 pounds heavier than my highest so I have two more boxes of things to go through as I drop weight. It should help save some money to have some things to wear for another few sizes. I just want to stay on top of it.

My goal is to try and live more simply. It will take a while, but I'm making progress!

Feeling more like myself

I'm really starting to feel like myself again after my recent sleeve revision surgery. The left side pain still lingers, but it gets better everyday. Sneezes are the worst, but it also hurts when I cough, laugh or move awkwardly. I also still have trouble sleeping on my side, but I know it will all get better with time. They told me it would take 4-6 weeks to heal and I'm only at just over 3 weeks, so I'm right on target.

I started eating pureed foods on Tuesday. The first day was a little difficult. I has some Egg Beaters in the morning, but they didn't go down smoothly. For lunch I has some pureed cauliflower soup. It went down easy peasy and honestly, I don't think I ate enough. I was a little light headed and hazy most of the day, even though I added a couple of shakes to keep my protein in check. I felt better in the evening after eating my favorite new concoction:

Noodle-less Manicotti

1 part cottage cheese
1 part marinara sauce
1 oz mozzarella  cheese

stir, then heat in the microwave until warm.

I realize it had been a long time (35 days!) since I had real savory food, so my bar is low, but it was SOOOO good! I think that I would add some ground beef later on for an easy and tasty, protein packed dinner. I didn't think I liked cottage cheese...maybe I don't normally, but I do like it this way! 10 more days of pureed food eating before I move to soft foods. After having a band for 6 years, I'm an expert at soft food!

I find the hardest thing has become getting my water in. I ordered some cool Swell bottles to inspire me.

This morning I had more Egg Beaters and they were great today! Lunch will be trickier. We are going to a Mexican restaurant so I'm going to order a side of refried beans and a side of guacamole.

I can feel myself itching to get active. I'm all ready to go work out and then "kablow"...it's like a knife to my side which reminds me that I'm totally not ready yet. All in due time. I know.

I'm just glad that the energy is coming back and my mind is getting back to normal! I've had some trouble feeling like myself the last year, but the last 6 months have been really "off". It's like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel and I want to run toward it but I'm in quicksand so I have to take it slow. But the light IS getting closer!

Hugs!

Getting back into things...

Today I'm starting my weekly check-ins. I want to keep myself accountable and this is the best way to do that.

Loss this week - 3.8 pounds
Total Loss since revision - 25.6 pounds
Total Loss from highest - 71.6 pounds

Wowzaa. I know the big losses are coming because of my highly restricted eating, but it still feels good. Weight-wise, I'm about in the middle of the range I spent the vast portion of the last 4 years. It is nice to start fitting into my clothes again.

It is amazing how much you can do to your body in just a few months of feeling terrible. But, I will pay that no mind as things are quickly coming back down. In addition to the 25 pounds, I have lost 18 inches! Most notably over 3 inches in my bust (goodbye back fat!) and over 3 inches in my belly. Also, I've lost over an inch in each thigh!!

As for recovery, my left side still hurts. I can tell it is getting better, but it is agonizingly slow! Heating pad and ice packs help my back pain that is coming along with it. It is absolutely better than last week, but annoyingly it just won't seem to go away.

Food

Today is my last day of the doctor required liquid diet. While I'm SO eager to start eating some savory things, it makes me a little nervous too. Today is day #35 of having only liquid in my diet. Other than being hungry, it has been easy. Moving to more solid food is nerve wracking for a few reasons:

• What if it makes me sick?
• What if it makes me gain weight?
• What if I try to eat something and it won't go down?

Those are all things I had to deal with when I got my band, so I know I will be okay. But the doubts are still there. With the band, I always knew I could go get fluid out or even get the whole thing out if I wanted. What I have done is permanent. You would think I would get panicky about that, but I really don't. I get a little anxious on occasion, then I remember everything I have fought through and done. I will do whatever necessary to help myself be and stay healthy!

It will be a learning curve, but I have no doubt I will figure it out!

My plan for tomorrow is this:

• Breakfast - greek yogurt
• AM Protein Power Up - Shake
• Lunch - Pureed Cauliflower Soup
• PM Protein Power Up - Shake
• Dinner - cottage cheese with spaghetti sauce

One step at a time!

Fitness

I still can't work out, which is good because I don't think I would be able to anyway. However, my back seems to be better when I don't sit around so much. I'm going to test it today and walk some at lunch. I will keep it leisurely and stop if I feel like it. If it hurts more after, then I won't walk anymore until I'm better. But if (as I hope) it keeps it warm and loose, it actually just might do me some good.

Plus, it is a glorious day outside. I might not get to go to the ballpark for Rangers Opening Day, but that doesn't mean I can't get a little sun!! Fingers crossed!

I will be patient though. I know with solid food and ramping up nutrition, the energy will come. But it is easier to move something that is already moving!

Weekend

The weekend was nice. BFF was in Vegas, so I had to entertain myself. I spent a couple of evenings last week with an old friend that was in town. Her son is my godson and it was great to see him. He is such a good kid!

Saturday I saw Zootopia with Debidoodle. It was super cute! Plus, I love spending time with her. It is crazy to think we would have never met if we hadn't had WLS. For those that are new to my blog, Debi & I met at a WLS support group after we got banded around the same time. Fortunately, she is not having any trouble with her band. Yay!

Sunday was the First Communion for another godson. He looks like Mowgli from the new Jungle Book movie! He did a great job. I got him a lego rosary. Who even knew such a thing existed??

Immediately after, I picked up BFF from the airport and we hit the grocery store. I bought several things to test out in upcoming days.

Tomorrow night I'm going to see Springsteen! What, what!?! Then I have a happy hour on Wednesday. Hopefully the week will be uneventful!

Hugs!

One month...

It has been exactly one month since I started my pre-op diet. Starting on the first of the month makes the breakdown easy:

Pre-op Week 1 - 10.4 pounds lost
Pre-op Week 2 -   4.6 pounds lost
Post-op Week 1 -  4.4 pounds lost
Post-op Week 2 -  2.8 pounds lost
Remaining Days -   1.6 pounds lost

TOTAL -  23.8 pounds lost

I feel like that is a pretty amazing accomplishment. I'm still drinking only shakes/liquids. Other than the inconvenience it causes for socializing, it is fine by me. I suppose I'm ready for some new flavors, but it certainly isn't as bad as I had thought it would be. This is my 32nd day with no solid food and I'm not going crazy. It is a freaking miracle.

Anyway, this is what 23.8 pounds lost looks like at the moment.

I tried to be as comparative as possible. At first I thought maybe the second outfit is just a little more flattering than the first, but I realize it is more than that. I have lost a whole lot of bloat. It feels really good!

I still have an ache in my left side. They said it could last up to 6 weeks! Now THAT is likely to drive me crazy. I would gladly take another week of liquids to lose the annoying pain. Crossing my fingers it fades over the weekend.

Tuesday I can start eating some more things. Yogurts and puddings, plus pureed foods. My dad made a bunch of soups I can't wait to try! I plan to bring my bullet blender to work to puree them each day. Shake for breakfast, pureed soup for lunch and dinner. I think I might add a shake in the afternoons if I'm short on protein.

It is more than possible for me to reach my next mini-goal before next month's check-in. So very close to that number I need to see to be confident I will be able to hang-glide in Rio!!!

Hugs!

Scars

Scars can be ugly. There are creams, ointments and oils to get rid of them or lighten them.

When I got the excess skin taken off my arms, many people were aghast that I would voluntarily have an operation that would leave a scar on my arm from elbow to armpit. To be honest, I thought about it a lot. I was concerned. But the skin on my arms was such a nuisance. When I would work out, sometimes I would think that someone was coming up behind me. But nope...it was just my bat-wings flopping around in the wind.

It was during that time that I realized that everyone has scars. Sometimes, like mine, they are visible. Although, I would argue mine aren't too bad. I had been working out three mornings a week in close proximity to several people and it took about 4 months before any of them noticed my scars. People just don't pay attention to that kind of thing.


You might see evidence of burns or accidents on people's faces or bodies. Some people have scars from their chicken pox or acne. My dad has a scar the entire length of one shin because he decided to add kerosene to the furnace when he was a little boy. (Side note: how my dad survived his childhood is a mystery...)

I have all sorts of scars I know are there, but people wouldn't see. On my head from the time I cat-sat for a friend. He assured me that the cat was really nice if you don't pet him with your hands. Um, no... I have scars from my weight loss surgeries. Or from where I sliced my hand with a knife. I still have a bump on my knee from when I cut it on a screw sticking out of the floor when I was in the 6th grade.

Everyone has scars. But most scars no one can see. Emotional scars from any number of things. I have several friends that suffer from anxiety and/or depression. Friends that were abused or mistreated. Friends who were bullied, lied to, made fun of...  Even when the wounds heal, there are scars.

Our scars might tell our story, but they don't define us.

Hugs!