Monday, October 10, 2011

Happy Columbus Day!

Lots to talk about today!! So, let's get to it.

Might as well start with some TMI, hmmm?  I'm on a birth control pill that makes it so I only have four periods per year.  I love that and it is super awesome.  Except, of course, for those four times per year.  I have no idea how my body knows it's coming, but it does.  I guess I have been doing it long enough that it knows the drill, I don't know.  Anyway, last week was my version of PMS.  I'm starving, I eat, I crave, I eat...oh my, it was not good.  Add all the extra food to my bloating and today I hit a high on the scale that I haven't seen for a while.  That is NOT okay.

I can't lie to myself anymore.  I have been in maintenance.  I would push here and there, mostly after I was bad (like now.)  But it never lasts long and really I'm just working out a lot so I can eat bad stuff.  While there is really nothing wrong with that, if I am ever going to make it to my goal, I have got to do better. 

The part that stinks is that I don't think I have any more motivation this time than I have the other 137 times I have jump started myself in the last year.  So, what will make this different?  Honestly, I'm not sure yet.  I do know that my London trip was my gift to myself for losing 100 pounds and since I haven't accomplished that yet, it is kind of a problem.  I have several size 10 pairs of jeans I bought that don't really fit yet.  I would like to fit in them by the holidays and that should be absolutely doable. 

I need to get back to my one day at a time mentality.  The last time I really lost any weight was at the beginning of the year.  Maybe I need to go back and read my blogs for some guidance.  I made a fill appointment for 10/31 today.  That is three weeks away which gives me plenty of time to focus and see if I really NEED it or not. 

New topic...I went to CrossFit for the first time in almost three weeks today!  It was great!  The 400m warm up kind of felt like a beating though.  I forget how fast those folks run.  I started third, WAY ahead of the pack and I was pretty much last at the end.  Bleh.  I was breathing hard and wheezing.  Good thing I have no excuses not to get back into the routine. 

However, it was a lifting day and I can lift!  I maxed out on my Press (lifting the weigh from my shoulders about my head otherwise standing still) at 75#.  The last time I did Presses, I only got to 65# and I made a note that I barely made it.  So YAY!!  Then we did Deadlifts where you lift the weight from the floor up with your arms straight down so it is lifting with your legs.  My max deadlift last time was 105#.  WG partnered up with me today and we started there.  Both of us had an easy time with it so we methodically moved up in weight.  I maxed out at 175#!!  SEVENTY pounds more than last time.  Obviously I wasn't pushing very hard then, huh??  :)  I bet tomorrow is more cardio heavy...scary!

I plan to CrossFit 4 times this week and Jazzercise twice with a bonus Pure Muscle class on Saturday.  By the way, that Jazzercise Pure Muscle class is no joke!!  My body is feeling it for sure.

And I will leave you with this:
I was feeling fat this weekend and I needed to see how far I have come.  The bottom pair was at my biggest and the top pair I'm just getting into.  I picked up the bottom ones...a little bigger than the old Right Size 3 from Lane Bryant.  It was hard to believe that I not only fit in those at one time, around my surgery date, I was BUSTING out of them.  No matter how frustrated with myself I am at the moment, I can't let myself forget that.


Kristin50 said...

I love the visual picture of how far you have come! You look stunning!

Glad you are getting back on track to reach your goal!

FitBy40 said...

Oh, how I wish I had saved my old jeans so I could do this! That is so cool.
You and I seem to be in the same place. I'm pretty much happy as long as I don't gain and wonder where my desire to actually LOSE weight went?!
You're on this, and you'll be back on track in no time.

Nora said...

I like the visual as well. I think your London 100 lb gift is the perfect incentive to get back on track with your WL!!!

speck said...

Well first of all, you've heard what everyone thinks of you in that red dress! You have done great Beth.

I completely understand about the motivation topic. I too have went back and read blogs other other bloggers and that has helped me tremendously. It helps to know that the ones who are at the end of the rainbow so to speak still have their moments.

What has helped me this time is planning. I made sure I had a lot of protein in the house. That alone has helped a lot.

I hope this helps. Sorry so long and rambling. :)

Debi said...

That picture is AMAZING! I love that. I was thinking about pulling out my old "fat outfit" and comparing it to what I wear now to see how far I've come.

You can hit 100 before London. I will make sure of it. And I am right there with you that I have been in maintenance. We are going to bust this out and get to where we want to be.

Jessica said...

Love the pic! Truly motivational!

Justawallflower said...

Oh my goodness, I was at a birthday dinner last Thursday, and a woman there asked me how easy it was now that I was in maintainance (I had made a comment that I hadn't lost in over 4 months) and I got so angry. Not at her, but myself. I have been in maintainance when I still have over 30 pounds to lose! I am so mad at myself for doing this! Like you, I am working out to eat! Nothing wrong with that, if I were at my goal weight!

Have I told you how much I miss you? Have a wonderful day, and awesome with the pants! I wear my fat pants every month when I start feeling really depressed and fat!

Theresa aka Tessie Rose said...

Beth Ann, I'm in the same can do this, and please drag me along with you!!!

Andrea said...

Love the picture of the jeans! That is such a good reminder of how far you're come and super motivating to keep going!

Elizabeth said...

Love the comparison pic of the jeans! That is an awesome reminder. I think that some times we can't always see the difference in the mirror because you look at yourself everyday.

Also, I have been meaning to tell you how absolutely stunning that you look in the red dress! Have a great week!

Stacey said...

Love the pic! TOM is a b*tch on wheels. It will play havoc with all the good work you have done, good on you for catching it! :)

PS. the Sept pic is hawt!

Cece said...

What a cool photo ! Also, the gym I am going to join has Cross-Fit and I immediately thought of you (not that I'll be doing it any time soon but it's nice to know that it's there) :)

Maria said...

Love the jeans pic!!! I wish I could Cross Fit 4x a week! So jealous ;)

♫ Drazil ♪ said...

Seriously - I could read not a single word of this post (I did read it all tho) and the picture would tell the whole story. Amazing Beth. Amazing. Honestly. Way to go.

Becky said...

Beth Ann you have come so far. Pick up where you are now, and lets go!!! Wanna know what I ate for dinner? Chinese food, lol! And it bet the calories were outrageous, but I'm going to get over it right now. Ok, done. And on to tomorrow!! We're going to Leap to Goal in just a few months!!

~Lisa~ said...

What a terrific photo!! Talk about inspiration - I love it!!