What did I think was going to happen?

When you see a pattern emerge, it is rarely coincidental.  But it isn't always easy to determine cause and effect since sometimes it is a little more circular than linear.  As you may or may not have noticed, I have taken a little break from Blogger. 

1. I haven't been blogging. 
2. I have gained weight. 

Those are two facts and I 100% believe they are related.  What I honestly can't tell you is which one causes the other.  I don't know if I'm busy, so I stopped keeping up with blogger/blogging and with that I was too busy to focus on my healthy eating choices.  Or did I consciously stop blogging so I wouldn't have to account for my poor choices.  I'm embarrassed to say that it could as easily be the latter.

Well, I'll be damned.  The more I put it into words, the more I think it is actually that.  I guess in the end it doesn't matter, the outcome is the same.  If you notice my daisy ticker at the top...it is now almost negative 5 pounds.  Holy crap.  I created that ticker to show more progress, but instead I went backward.  I can't blame it on bloating.  Hell, I have been working out, so I can't even blame it on lack of exercise.  It was bad eating and too much eating.  Simple as that.

Okay, so what am I going to do about it?

1. Scheduled a fill for 2/14.  The timing is no coincidence.  I think my Band doc is the perfect V-day date!  I've been hungry a lot lately and I make poor choices when I'm hungry.
2. Start logging again.  I did so well for several weeks, logging my food and drink.  Then I just stopped.  Time to start again.  If I don't write down what I'm eating, it only takes me about 2 days to get to the point that I stop paying attention. 
3. Quit using "I'm busy" as an excuse.  We all know that we have time to do the things we want to do.  So, I will start blogging again every day.  Additionally, I will start reading YOUR blogs each evening because, honestly, I need you.  When I hide from you, I lose myself. 
4. I will continue to workout at my current pace.

As truly pissed at myself as I am at the moment, I want to remind myself of a few things:

• The "fat pants" I am wearing today are a size 12, not 24.
• I am 7 pounds from my lowest, not 17...or you know, 70.
• This is how it works.  You lose sight of your goals for a bit and then you put yourself back on track.  That is why I got a Lap Band.  Time to remember the past and what I'm fighting against.  I'm not there, just working to keep myself from ever going back.
• I am still 13.80 pounds and about a size and a 1/2 under what I weighed in on this day last year. 

So, I have beaten myself up, set some goals and reminded myself that this isn't the end of the world.  I just hit a warning zone and it is time to take significant action.

I will let you know how the day went tomorrow.

<3 & Hugs!!