I have a blog? Wha?

Okay, folks.  No excuses, just apologies.  If any of you out there are even still keeping up with me, to you I apologize greatly. 

I got overwhelmed and just shut down.  With the never ending weightloss journey, the surgery, work issues, & my upcoming TOAL (trip of a lifetime), I just stopped being able to put things into words.  I needed to get past a few things.  I addressed some work issues and good, bad or otherwise, I did what I thought was right. 

Then last Wednesday, I had my surgery.  For those of you that might have forgotten since it has been a bajillion years, I had a breast lift & augmentation and an arm lift.  If you are interested in my experience I have logged it below.  Otherwise, I commit to checking in more regularly and not letting myself get to an overwhelmed point...at least for the foreseeable future! 

Wednesday

BFF picked me up bright and early and we were at the surgery center at 7:15am.  After checking in, the super nice nurse took me back to prep.  I could feel that I was very anxious and I tried to breathe through it.  I was sitting in a recliner chair when she tried to put in my IV.  It had to be done on my hand since part of the surgery was on my arms. 

For some reason, it didn't work out and she had to try again.  I asked her if we could use the other hand.  I felt myself getting woozy.  Next thing I knew I was looking into the face of some man I didn't know and had no idea where I was.  He was saying that I was having surgery and naming my doctor and telling me I had passed out. Oopsie!  (As a side note, I still have the most enormous bruise on my hand.  I guess from pulling the IV out when I passed out.  It has been one of the things that hurt most...crazy!!)

The nurse said that I was just talking then all of a sudden, I was out.  They decided not to risk doing it again at that time.  As I came to, they asked if I wanted BFF to come back and I said no because she would be freaked out from having me pass out.  But then I decided that I wanted her there.  I was sweating like I had never sweat before. 

The surgeon came in to mark me up and he went through FIVE Sharpies because I was so wet.  Finally he gave up and decided to do the rest when I was on the table.  I had to sit down three different times while he was doing it.  In fact, one time I said I didn't need to and he said that I was shaking and I needed to sit down.  I know the anxiety was just a culmination of my overwhelmedness...yeah, that's a word.

Anyway, it was time.  BFF went up front and I went back to the OR and crawled onto the operating table.  That was kind of funny, but why transfer me when I'm awake, right?  They gave me a mask of laughing gas and one breath made me relax.  I remember saying, "I'm drunk" then the anesthesiologist (which happened to be the strange man in front of me as I came to) said, "Yeah, you are."  Ha!  That's the last thing I remember.

When I woke up, I was beat up but okay.  The surgery took about 3 hours and it took about 45 minutes for me in recovery.  BFF got all the instructions and took me home.  Can I just tell you what an amazing friend I have?  She truly went above and beyond.

I don't remember much about that first day.  Mostly I just laid in my recliner and we watched TV.  That night BFF slept in my spare room while I slept in the recliner.  Every 4 hours, she would get up and give me pain meds.  The thing I realized is that I couldn't make the recliner foot stool go up and down on my own.  So she had to get up, push my feet down, then I would go to the bathroom, then she would give me meds, pull the lever to prop up my feet, then go back to bed.  The super crazy thing is that she went to work the next day!

Thursday

BFF took the morning off and took me to the doctor.  I looked pretty styling in my my PJ top, but I did put on sweatpants instead of the PJ bottoms!  The doc & nurse said that everything was good and to come back on Tuesday. 

BFF took me home, hooked me up with some lunch and went to work.  She propped my feet up on a chair because I still couldn't use the recliner.  It all worked out.  I spent the day drugged up.

That night Lizard came over after work and brought me dinner.  We watched a couple of episodes of American Ninja Warrior before BFF came over after.  Yes, BFF came over to take care of my drains.  If you all don't know about drains...  I had tubes literally sticking out of my skin from the backside of my underarm.  They were taped in place and led to small bottles that I could clip to my shirt or bra in the front that had to be drained each day.  These things are the worst.  They are uncomfortable.  Grody stuff goes into them.  They really can't be hidden.  Bleh. 

If you are planning to have surgery, I would suggest that you plan to not go to work until one day after getting the drains out.  Apparently people go to work with them still in, but you can't shower and again, they are very bulky and uncomfortable.  In retrospect, I would have not even considered going in on Monday or Tuesday.

Lizard stayed through the night and followed the same pattern BFF set with helping me up and feeding me meds.  That superwomen got up and left at 5:30am so she could go run and get ready and go to work.  Awesome!

Friday

Friday morning, I discovered that I could maneuver the recliner myself which made for a very big deal.  I was much more mobile!  I still pretty much just hung out in the recliner and watched TV.  I tried to read, but I found that I couldn't concentrate. 

Friday evening Debi came over and kept me company.  I wasn't the best companion, but it was so wonderful to have her there.  We just hung out and continued to watch TV.  Thank you BBF!!

Saturday

After Debi left Saturday morning, it took me a bit to try and clean myself a little bit and put on "regular" clothes.  The drains were totally noticeable (I called them my alien babies) and I walked like an elderly person.  BFF picked me up and helped me put on a sweater to cover the arm wraps.  We met our friend Armstrong for lunch at Chipotle.  Delish!

After lunch, we went to a Sports Cuts to get my hair washed.  The girl didn't speak English so she wasn't sure what was going on, but we got it done.  I felt so much better!!  After that BFF & I went for a pedicure.  By the time that was over, I was exhausted.

After getting home, I slept 14 of the next 18 hours!!

Sunday

Sunday was the worst.  The doctors had warned me that there would be some emotional issues and even regret after surgery.  BFF came over after church and without meaning to I just started crying.  I was crying and trying to explain to her that it was normal that it was in the literature.  Heh. 

Mostly, I just tried to get through Sunday. 

Monday

I had decided not to go to work until I got the drains out on Tuesday.  Monday was another day to just get through.  It wasn't as bad as Sunday, but I was still kind of miserable.  I went and got my hair washed and blowdryed in anticipation of going to work the next day.  I also got some lunch.  I started to get very sore from sitting in the recliner all the time.

Monday night I went to bed early just wanting those drains TO GO!

Tuesday

I went to the doctor and was so happy to get the drains taken out!  The bad part was that I had to give the holes a day to close before I could shower.  I told my boss that I thought I should wait until I could shower before coming back to work and he agreed wholeheartedly!

Doctors orders:  1.  Sleep in the recliner for another week.  2.  Keep wraps on arms for two more weeks.  3.  Don't lift arms above shoulders.  4.  Don't lift more than the equivalent of a half gallon of milk.

I went to the store and bought a couple of bras like the surgical one I had so I could wash them.  I also bought some new Ace bandages because the ones on my arms were starting to reek!!

It was frustrating because I wanted to get groceries, but with the weight limitations, I really couldn't!

Wednesday

I didn't take any medication last night except for Tylenol, so I didn't sleep but maybe 3 or 4 hours.  But at least I don't have any medicine head.  My body hurts from sitting in that chair.  I hope that by being at work today it will work itself out some.

I got up and showered.  BFF came over to reapply my arm bandages.  Did I mention how awesome she is??  I have some pain at the incisions but it is bearable.  I also have a lot of pec pain, but again, it is bearable.  I will take some more Tylenol at lunch.

The worst part is how much my back hurts from sitting in that recliner for a week!

I hope to work until 4pm and then go get my hair washed.  But I promised myself that I would stop before I get too tired because I really need to get my hair washed tonight.  Plus, I need to get home safely.  :)

I promise to get back into reading/writing mode and see what is going on with all of you!  If you are considering sugery (or even if you are just curious) please leave any questions you have in the comments and I will try to get them addressed in upcoming posts.

Big "catch up" hugs!!