40 by 40 (or Here We Go Again...)

Before I get started with the 40 by 40 commentary.  I have a story. 

A while back I was talking to my mom about dieting.  She mentioned that she was going to dinner with friends and she was going to have to eat dessert which was going to mess up her food plan.  I asked why she had to eat dessert and she explained that her friends don't have weight issues and never have to diet.  So when she refuses dessert, they insist or she feels like they don't understand. I think she feels like they think, "oh, here we go again."

Soon after that, I was talking to a friend about her sister.  She said that she loves her sister, but she gets so annoyed because when her sister is on a diet, they can only go certain places to eat.  I asked if that wasn't a good thing that she was trying to focus on her nutrition.  My friend (who is very sympathetic to my challenges) kind of commented that it just gets annoying because she will diet for a while and then will stop and then will start again...and everyone is like "here we go again."  I talked to her a little bit more about my mom's story and about myself, how I have to work really hard to lose weight and how that isn't easy to do all the time so it comes and goes.  I think it gave her another perspective.

Cue to a little later and I was talking to BFF about my 40 by 40 plan.  Just to be clear, BFF is like a sister to me and there are few that would want success for me more than her!  I forget her exact words, so I don't want to misquote.  However, I know that her point was that she has known me long enough to see my ebbs and flows and she supports whatever I need to do to be successful.  But for just a minute...instead of hearing the support...I just heard "here we go again." 

When I first got my lap band, I decided to show, not tell.  It wasn't a secret, but I was so convinced that I would be successful that I let that success do my talking.  I was successful!  I'm still successful!  But now I need to refocus and I need to stop with the half-hearted stuff, because while that helps me maintain, it does NOT help me lose.  I think in my head I feel like "here I go again."  I need to insist to MYSELF that I can do this and that I WILL do this.

Which brings me to my 40 by 40 Challenge.  My goal is to lose 40 pounds by my 40th birthday.  I just turned 39, so I have a year.  I went back and looked at the things that helped make me successful before and I'm returning to those behaviors:

• Pre-plan and log food.  This is a big deal.  If I don't know what I'm eating for the entire week on Sunday, then I know by Thursday, things will not go well. 
• No bread.  This is the only thing I'm ruling out.  (Except one vacation pizza exemption for this weekend.)  Bread is my gateway food.  If I'm eating it, I have a tough time controlling it.  I gave it up fully for nine months and then controlled it for over a year.  Time to take it away for a while!
• Drink in moderation. 
• In fact, everything in moderation. It all depends on if it fits in the food plan for the day.
• Blog and other accountability.  I need to tell myself what I'm doing each day and I need to tell people how I'm doing.  I tend to hide it when things aren't going well. 
• Work out.  I usually do well with this, but I need to push it.  I pulled out my FitBit and I'm going to give tracking a go.

I'm getting a fill on 6/18, so that will help.  For almost a year, I didn't have much restriction.  I was trying to do it on my own.  I'm not good at that, obviously.  It will limit what I can eat which will be annoying because I haven't dealt with that in a long time, but it will help with the hunger.  If I sacrifice now, in a year, I won't remember all the sacrifices, but I will be happy with the results!

One thing I wish I would have blogged more is what I ate.  I'm having trouble finding good things to make and bring for lunches.  I need some good ideas.  Today, I had egg beaters with mushrooms & cheese for breakfast.  I made chicken salad with light sour cream & mustard for lunch.  A prosciutto wrapped mozzarella stick for a snack.  Also have sugar free Popsicles and some soup if I need it.  Dinner is a spinach salad.

One day at a time, right?!

Hugs!