I thought a lot about my post yesterday. First, I had to laugh that so many of you thought I was talking about poop. My apologies!! I do want to stress that I KNOW I'm not failing in any way. I have come so far and have had lots and lots of success. I'm not sad or depressed and I'm not beating myself up.
I just like to do my best and I know right now that I'm not. I'm doing okay and that is perfectly fine. But I want to do better. I still want to lose at least another 25 pounds and I'm not going to do that by coasting. My BFF makes no bones about the fact that she works out a lot so she can eat what she wants and I think that is FANTASTIC! She is also at or very near her goal weight. When I'm at or near my goal weight, I hope that is my mentality too. But I have to get there first!
Yesterday, I had around a 250 calorie deficit. Not bad at all, especially for me on a day with no exercise. But I can do better. I didn't go crazy with the treats, but I still had too much last night. It's not like I'm expecting myself to go without. I'm not. But I would like to learn how to be satisfied with a small treat...and not have to have so much. Baby steps!
I have my girls dinner tonight. Normally, I eat whatever I want on these occasions. I also normally work out at lunch on these days. I'm not working out today because I have a chiropractor appointment. My plan is to forgo alcoholic beverages and dessert. I will focus on enjoying my entree. That is my baby step of the day.
Also, for those of you that mentioned it, I do log my food. I log all of my food and exercise. For a long while logging kept me from overindulging. But right now, it isn't working for me. I just have to keep focused and figure out the best course of action. One day at a time.
I'm so proud of my nephew. He is 13 and has joined the track team. He runs the 1600 & 800 meter races and he is sweeping the field. He just continues to win and win and I LOVE that for him!!
One of the things that has changed in my life over the last couple of years is my focus on love for others. I was always worried about me, me, me and what I wanted and what would make ME happy. Not that I didn't always love people, I did. But now I try to put others first. What I have found is that if I focus on love and making other people happy, my happiness follows automatically. The thing is though, I had to let go of my pride and my ego which was really, really hard. But once I did, I felt so free. Other people's opinions just don't have the hold on me that they once did.
I have several people in my life right now, at least one in every circle, going through a struggle. They each are drowning trying to keep control in situations where they don't necessarily have it. I just continue to pray that they will find peace in the realization that everything is not always about them. I know that was my hardest lesson (and there are many days I realize I'm still learning it!), but once I truly realized it, I became genuinely happy.
My second greatest lesson I have learned is that it is not mine to judge. Everyone is responsible for their own path. All I can do is love them and offer a place in my heart.
I was just looking at the calendar and I realized that my life is so awesome. :) I have so much upcoming fun that I hardly know what to do with myself. Just a peak for you... This month I have tickets to THREE awesome musicals. I LOVE theater! A girls outing and four dinners with different friends.
In June, I'm celebrating my birthday with Fuzzy's tacos and Bowling for Soup (my most favorite band evah!). YAY!! We have tickets to the IndyCar race at TMS, tickets to TWO more musticals, plus concert tickets to see NKOTBSB (if you know who that is...I like you automatically!) We have vacations in Vegas and then in Long Beach.
I mean seriously...I could burst from the fun!!