Thursday, March 31, 2011

I'm Back, Baby!!

Lordy, I had no idea how bad I felt yesterday until I woke up this morning.  Antibiotics and steroids are good, good things.  :)  I laugh that I thought I would go to Jazzercise yesterday.  I didn't even make it to 2pm at work.  I went home, took a two hour nap and was still in bed by 8:30!!  But the good news is that I feel great today.  So YAY!!

More good news:  today is the last day of the month and time to update the ticker!  I'm down another 8.4 pounds this month which is super great for me.  Ignoring my 6 week Challenge for the moment, I reached my mini-goal of being 90 pounds down by April 1st!!  Now, I know that some of today's weightloss is probably dehydration from being sick, but I only needed to lose 2 tenths and I lost 2.2...so I'm counting it!  :)  My next non-challenge mini-goal is to be down 95 pounds by 5/01.  I KNOW I will make that now.  I KNOW IT!  I will measure tonight and see if I have any good news there.

Bad news:  I'm still really behind on my Swing for the Fences Challenge I made for myself.  I will have to lose 3 pounds a week going forward to do it which is above anything I have done in a long while.  But I'm going to try!!  Also bad, I haven't had ANY time to catch up on blogs.  :(  But Friday night, my plan is to go home and read, read, read!  I know you all will forgive me for being a little late with my comments.

Today's get back on track exercise plan consists of a 2 mile walk at lunch and Jazzercise tonight.  I got up to do yoga this morning and then decided two workouts the day after being sick is plenty.  Yoga will make a comeback tomorrow. 

I need some prodding.  My goal for the year is to attend 150 Jazzercise classes (at least) which means an average of 3 per week.  I am going tonight and Saturday morning which is only two classes.  Soooo...I should make myself go tomorrow.  I think I can do that, but I also have only run once this week and I am supposed to run at least twice.  I should run at lunch and go to Jazzercise after work.  We will see if that happens. 

Have a great day, y'all!  It is so nice to be among the living again.  :)

HUGS!

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The Cheerleader is going to whine a little if you don't mind...

Thank you all so much for your support the last several days.  The funeral was lovely and my friend is perhaps the strongest person I have ever met.  She has some tough times ahead, but I know she will be okay.  Again, thank you.  I can't tell you how much your kind words mean to me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**Abrupt Change**
After this roller coaster weekend, I end up sick.  I have a sinus infection.  Ugh.  I have antibiotics & medicine for the symptoms and I will be just fine this time tomorrow.  But right now, I was to say f*ck it to my challenge.  I want to lay around all day and eat bad crap. 

I enjoyed last weekend.  I didn't go hog wild with my food, but I ate quite a bit and I did drink a lot more that usual (which is none.)  I didn't feel guilty at all because that is one big reason I'm doing all this...so I can enjoy myself and be comfortable with myself.  But yesterday, I didn't have that excuse.  I was just sad and feeling sorry for myself and I ate everything in sight.  I know in my heart it wasn't pigging out like the "old me."  But it certainly wasn't the new me either.  I'm ready to get back into my routine.

Today I want to be lazy and eat crap.  I hate being whiny.  I hate feeling like crap.  Ugh.

Okay, whinefest is over.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is actually going to happen...  I'm not going out work out at lunch, but I will go to Jazzercise.  The best I have felt in the last 3 days (I've been feeling bad since Sunday) is when I worked out on Monday.  So, I think a little Jazzercise will do me some good. 

And I'm going to eat like I do normally.  It's not hard and I will be proud of myself for not wallowing like I want. 

As far as my 6-week Challenge, it is what it is.  I'm not changing goals or giving up.  I know I probably won't reach my goal, but it doesn't mean I can't get as absolutely close to it as possible.  I have 3 more weeks to show myself what I can do.  I know when I wake up tomorrow, I will feel better and I will be ready to roll.  Just gotta get there.  :)

Oh...and I'm mega behind on reading posts, but I plan to relax and catch up this weekend.  Hopefully you will hear from me soon. 

Hugs!

Monday, March 28, 2011

What a Weekend!

Where to begin...  When I posted on Friday, I was completely out of sorts.  I'm not even sure if it all made sense.  I had spent the day with Lizard, her family and our friends and it was such a roller coaster of emotions.  I already had all these plans in place to go to Indianapolis to see my sorority sisters and I decided that I needed to go.

On the plane, I was exhausted and very down.  But I told myself that if I was going to do this that I wasn't going to mope.  The sadness that day was not about me and I needed to shake it off and enjoy myself.  By the time I landed, got the rental and made my way to the hotel, it was 8pm.  I met my friends around 8:30pm at a tapas restaurant.  It was delicious!  The drinks were excellent!  And the company was perfect!  Just what I needed.


After dinner, we made our way to the downtown bars.  The NCAA tournament was in town along with a Fire Fighter convention.  It was packed!  Our first bar choice had a huge line and it was 36 degrees outside.  We quickly decided to go to an Irish pub we had passed on the corner.  I'm so glad we did.  We were the last ones to get in as a line started forming behind us.  We went to the bar and got drinks in less than 5 minutes (while a guy said he had been waiting to be served for 30...).  After getting the drinks, a perfect table magically opened up.  The guy to girl ratio was AT LEAST 2 to 1.  We parked there and were there until 2:30AM!  I lost count of how many guys told me I was hot.  HA!  I felt great! 

I woke up the next morning at 8:30am thinking of Lizard.  I couldn't fall back asleep, but I actually didn't feel too bad for 5 hours of sleep.  I met a friend for lunch and we went shopping.  I bought a super cute clutch purse from Nordstom (WAY on sale!) to take out that night.  Then I went back to the hotel to get ready.

I met my sorority sisters at Palomino for dinner and the mood was already electric because the Butler game was going on.  For those of you that don't know, Butler is a small, private school in Indianapolis and they were playing to get into the Final Four!  And they WON!!  YAY!!  There were 14 of us that made it to dinner and it was like we went back in time.  We had such a fun time!
And these are my dear friends that decided that we should get together.

One of my sisters came over after dinner and said that she had no idea who the hot redhead was on the other end!  She had to ask someone.  :)  I had a TON of compliments on my hair, so that was obviously nice.  All in all, I had an amazing weekend and I'm so glad I went.

On the other hand, the scale didn't like it so much.  Today is my weekly weigh in day and instead of losing 2.2 pounds like my goal, I gained 1.2 pounds.  So, I'm currently 3.4 pounds behind on my current Challenge.  But, you know what?  I'm okay with that.  Today, I'm back on the horse.

Tonight is the viewing, so I brought my clothes to work out during lunch.  Tomorrow morning is the funeral, so I already have it in my head that I'm going to run tomorrow afternoon.  I will not let these surprises get me completely off track.  This is the new me and the new me is not satisfied with "fine"...I want more and I will get it!!

HUGS!

Friday, March 25, 2011

I'm sad.

My heart is breaking today. Just a few minutes before BFF was to pick me up for work, she called with the horrible news that our friend Lizard's husband was dead. She found him this morning in his tv room and he was already gone. 55 years old. He was a robust man's man and bigger than life, no sign of sickness, heart trouble...nothing. Unfortunately, he smoked and otherwise did not treat his body as he should. He will be missed. It just isn't real yet.

I'm at the airport, making my way to Indy with a heavy heart. Lizard wouldn't have it any other way and come to think of it, neither would've her husband. I will be back on Sunday and she is in the best of hands. What my wonderful network of friends do not take care of, her family will.

This is so hard. I love you, Lizard.

Sigh. Enjoy every moment.

Hugs.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Question for BOOBS attendees...

What time are you all flying in and out?  I was thinking I would fly in on Thursday sometime and leave Sunday around 1 or 2pm.  Just thought I would do a little informal polling.  :)

Hugs!

Wave of Inspiration

Y'all know I met Fluffy on Sunday and she has just opened up a whole new world to me.  She made me realize that there are future goals to be set that I haven't even considered!  My body as I know it is temporary.  Today, I'm the smallest I have ever been as an adult and I DON'T KNOW YET what all it will actually be able to do in the future.  It is an exciting time and it makes me want to try more...do more...push harder.

I mentioned in yesterday's post that I got up again (two days in a row!) to do yoga.  [FYI...I do Namaste Yoga on Discovery Health & Fitness.  It is a 30 minute show with commercials, so I record and FF'd making it about 25 minutes.  So not too much of a time committment and it is on the beginner side as far as yoga goes.  I like it!]  Then at lunch, I did some interval training...you know, run/walk/run/walk.  I would walk for 2 minutes, then run for 1 minute.  I started running at 5.5 mph and realized that wasn't hard enough, so the next interval, I moved it up to 6.0 mph.  I have NEVER run that fast, for 60 seconds or anything else.  Each interval, I would move it up one tenth of a mph until my last interval of 6.6 mph.  Holy cow!  Even for just 60 seconds, that impresses me.  But my toe started hurting a bit, so I finished up.  Even still, I decided to go to Jazzercise after work.  I figure I need to ride this wave as much as I can before I remember that I don't like to exercise.  :)

Last night, as I was winding down, I started getting tired (as you do at night...) and thought that maybe I wouldn't get up this morning for yoga.  I mean twice a week is fine, right?  Then I read Laura Belle and realized that I would be disappointed in myself if I didn't keep pushing.  So, yoga this morning...check!  I'm planning to walk around the lake with a coworker at lunch and go to Jazzercie tonight.

After all that, I'm going to let myself enjoy my mini-vacation with no guilt or worries whatsoever.  If I can work out, great!  If I'm having too much fun and can't find the time, that's okay too.  My hotel is 1.25 miles away from the spa where I booked an appointment on Saturday.  I would love to jog there and back, but it is apparently high of 45 degrees in Indy this weekend, so I'm not quite sure about that plan.  Brrrr...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for cheering me on.  I know 100% that I would not be pushing myself like this if it were not for you all.  31 days left in my challenge and 11.2 pounds to go!

HUGS!!

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Yoga makes me perky?

I did it again!  I got up this morning and did yoga.  Again!  I would like a medal, please.  :)  I felt SO good all day yesterday and I'm testing whether that was the yoga.  So far I'm feeling pretty perky!

At lunch yesterday, I worked out in the gym downstairs.  I usually run 2 miles at a 4.5-4.7 mph pace.  I walked long enough to get my iPod settled (20-30 seconds or so?) then I ran to the 3/4 mile mark at 4.8 mph, then a full mile at 5 mph, then finished the last 1/4 mile at 4.8.  Ended up at 2 miles in 25:00.  YAY #1 - my first 12 minute mile!!  YAY #2 - my fastest 2 miles beating my best time by 26 seconds!

Was it the yoga?  Or perhaps was it Cute Gymboy (not to be confused with Gym Boyfriend) flexing his muscles at me the whole time.  Seriously...this guy walks in, gets on the treadmill next to me, sprints for about 60-90 seconds, gets off and walks to the other side of the gym.  Our gym is separated into two parts, the treadmill/ellyptical side and the weights side.  You can only see a very small portion of each side from the other.  This guy decides to stand in the absolute ONLY spot he could stand on the weight side and still be in my line of sight.  Squating and lifting, standing around, looking hot.  I'm not complaining.  :)

After work, I went to tan, and there the cute little teenager at the desk SQUEALED when I walked in and said that she would LOVE to be able to pull off a short cut like me.  ::pause, blink, blink::  HAHAHAHAHA!!  Insecure little me, "pulling off the short cut".  It makes me laugh.  But what the hell!  I guess enough people have told me.  I should start believing it!

I'm psyching myself up for a lunch workout and Jazzercise tonight.  I know I can do it, I just want to be in a good mood for it.  :) 

Also, one of my closest friends is having knee surgery today and my dad is having knew surgery tomorrow.  I'm praying that they both go off without a hitch and that they get some much needed relief. 

Random alert:  Sugar Daddys rule!  I got some at the beginning of Lent to have when I'm having my chocolate cravings.  Best idea ever!!

HUGS!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Growing up feels good.

As you all know, I'm headed to Indianapolis this weekend for a random trip to meet up with my sorority sisters that I haven't seen in around 15 years.  YAY!  To give you a little history, in college, I wasn't planning to join a sorority.  When I finally did, I wasn't going to join this sorority because I was a legacy.  I was very insecure and I was afraid that as a legacy, I would be seen as a "token" of some sort.  But when I went to the rush parties, I clicked with the girls and it was the best sorority on campus.  So I accepted their bid and became a proud and lifelong member.

My junior year, I lived in the sorority "house" with my sorority mom (who was my best friend at the time), another random girl, and the Barbie twins (two beautiful blondes not related).  Now it turns out, the Barbie twins weren't only beautiful, they were great girls.  They were very popular in the sorority, but we remained tight as well.  Throughout college, probably mostly because of my insecurity, my feelings were often hurt and I felt left out.  By my senior year, I had ballooned up to 250 and I certainly didn't look the part of sorority girl.  My friends stood by me, but I always felt inferior.  Again, in retrospect, I think it was more my lack of confidence than anything anybody did TO me.

When the girls came up with this girls night, I decided it was time to see everyone again.  The last they saw me, I was probably in the 230 range and not feeling great about myself.  So, I thought it was time to give them something new to remember about me.  :) 

Last night, one of the coordinators (Queenie), sent out an email summarizing who was coming and some other details.  My name wasn't on the list, but another Beth Ann was on the list.  I wasn't sure if she got us mixed up or if she forgot about me.  I emailed (just) her back and confirmed I was coming.  Soon after, another sister I didn't know so well (Eyelashes), emailed and asked if she meant Beth Ann Me or Beth Ann X because if Beth Ann X was going to come all the way up from another state, then she would be so excited!  Heh.  At warp speed, I flew back to college and became the whiny insecure fat girl that just got her feelings hurt.  I mean...I just spent a ton of money on a plane ticket, hotel & car.  :(

I pouted for just a brief moment and then said BOLLOCKS!  I reminded myself that Queenie most likely made an honest mistake.  There are two Beth Anns for crying out loud and our last names even start with the same letter!  And Eyelashes & I weren't super close.  From what I remember, she was as sweet as pie and she probably doesn't even realize that I don't live in the area.  So, I sat up straight, threw my shoulders back and emailed everyone back, confirmed it was me and that I couldn't wait!  Eyelashes responded that she couldn't wait to see me and then proceeded to Friend me on Facebook.  Independently, another girl who was on all of the emails sent me an email saying how excited she is that I'm coming so we can catch up. 

So, there you have it.  The new me is happy to be going out for two girl's nights this weekend and didn't let a stupid little thing get in the way of that.  I know that this probably sounds so silly, petty, and stupid, but it was a good example of how the old me would quickly fall into a rabbit hole, but the new me is solidly on terra firma.  It's a good feeling! 

Before I leave you, I thought I would add the (slightly fuzzy and strangely demonic) picture from Cowgirl's birthday dinner on Saturday.  KK is the one giving her a kiss and BFF & I are in the back.  I just love these girls.  :)
This is so small, but I'm pretty sure I can see my collarbones.  If it is just a shadow...I don't care...that's my story!!

Oh and one last thing...I actually got up and did yoga this morning.  YAY!!  Getting up early is very hard for me so this is a big one.  Now let's see if I can get myself to do it again.  :)

HUGS!!

Monday, March 21, 2011

Things that are making me happy today. :)

  • Today is weekly weigh in day.  My weekly goal for my Swing for the Fences 6 week Challenge is 2.17 pounds.  I lost 2.2 pounds!  So right on the money. 
  • I wore a size 12 pair of jeans all weekend.  I don't think I will get tired of saying that anytime soon.  I think that I wore my 16s so long, "trying to get the good out of them", that I almost bypassed my 14s!  I'm wearing a pair of 14s today and they fit fine.  Probably slightly big in the hip/waist area, but they are fine.  The 16s will be retired this week. 
  • This week I officially hit the smallest point in my adulthood.  That is great for the obvious reason.  But what makes it even better is that I'm nowhere near a stopping point.  Usually by now (well before now actually), I would be thinking about "quitting".  But now, there is nothing to quit.  This is just my life and that is a GREAT feeling.
  • I shopped in regular stores this weekend.  I bought a size M top at Express and a size L cardigan at Anthropologie.  I have never shopped in stores like that and I have Fluffy to thank for that one!! 
  • I am really enjoying my haircut.  I'm not sure it is "me" forever, but it is great for me right now.  Plus, I think it has really allowed me to look at myself a little more objectively.  I think finally over the last week and weekend, I have been able to see what I have done.  I finally FEEL SMALLER.  I have a long way to go, but it is nice to really FEEL like I have gotten somewhere.  I think part of that was the total difference in my appearance due to my hair.  I will take some pictures this weekend, but here is an idea of the new shorter cut.  I think it is hard to get a total idea of the character of short hair in pictures, but you get the idea. 
  • I have nothing planned this week until I leave for Indianapolis on Friday.  That will allow me to work out to maximum capacity and get some things done before I go.  I need to do as well as I can M-Th, because Friday and Saturday, I feel a little debauchery coming on.  :)
  • I feel good. 
Hope you have things to be happy for today as well.  :)

HUGS!!

Sunday, March 20, 2011

YAY for meeting fellow bloggers!

To get you caught up...  I chopped my hair yet again on Saturday afternoon.  I'm not sure how long I will have it styled this way, but it is perfect for now.  And SO easy!  After the haircut, BFF & I made our way to the itty bitty town of Anna, TX.  Yesterday was our friend Cowgirl's birthday and we met her and another friend KK for dinnner.  The dinner was good, the cake after was fantastic, & the company was stellar! 

After church this morning, I had plannned to meet Ronnie, trisha, & Kecia for lunch.  Unfortunately, Ronnie had babysitter woes and the plan was to reschedule for next weekend.  Sadly, I will be out of town next weekend, but I look forward to meeting up with them the next time!!
 
In a fun turn of events, Fluffy emailed that she was going to be able to make it lunch with us.  Even though it was down to the two of us, we decided to meet anyway.  And I'm SO glad we did!  Fluffy has been banded for five or six years and it was like meeting with a Band goddess.  First of all, she is the least "fluffy" person I have ever met.  She is GORGEOUS!  We talked about all sorts of things and I loved her thoughts on meeting goals and maintenance.

I told her that I needed a shirt to wear out on my girls outing next weekend and she promptly set about finding me the perfect one.  I probably would have headed to Macy's but she suggested the smaller stores.  I was afraid I wouldn't fit into the clothes, but I went for it.  I followed her around like she was the Pied Piper as she confidently made her way around Gap, Express, Banana Republic, Anthropolgie and more.  I will take lots of pictures next weekend so you can see the winning outfit.  :) 

I had such a great time and I can't wait to get together with Fluffy again!

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend! 

Hugs!

Saturday, March 19, 2011

I love Saturdays.

When last we spoke...I was on my way to Babe's for some Lent Friday fried catfish.  YUM!  Little did I know that Babe's no longer serves catfish?  WTF?  Why would you stop serving your only seafood dish the first week of Lent???  My friends wanted to stay, so I went with the veggie plate.  This veggie plate consisted of salad with vinegrette dressing (not so bad), green beans (probably cooked in lard), corn (drowing in butter), mashed potatoes (no doubt made with whole milk and butter), cream gravy and biscuits.  What a healthy option [insert eyeroll].  So, I did the best I could with what I had and dealt with it.  I have to say that in the past, that would have been my cue to pig out for the rest of the day and I didn't, so that's good news.

After Jazzercise, I headed to Cato to see how far from a 12 I am.  Apparently, not far.  :)  Not only did I buy a size 12 dress...I bought a size 12 pair of jeans!!  I have NEVER fit in a 12 in my life.  I know sizes are bigger these days than they were when I was in high school, but I don't care.  I wouldn't say I'm a 12 yet.  But I'm solidly a 14 and I can fit into some 12s.  Man, this is a good feeling.  I can't even fathom what a 10 is going to feel like!  :)

After Jazzercise this morning, I thought it was such a beautiful day, I should spend some time outside.  My tanning salon is a little over 1/2 a mile from my apartment, so I walked over there and back.  That is a choice I never would have made before. 

I leave in a little while to get the hair cut again...some more.  And tomorrow is lunch with my fellow bloggers.  Fun weekend!!

Hugs!

Friday, March 18, 2011

BYOC

It’s BYOC Friday – Bring Your Own Crazy! Five little questions – some funny, some serious – that you can copy and paste to your blog. We do this in an effort to get to know each other better and to give our blogging brains a break! Enjoy!

1. Regardless of what stage you are in - in your weight loss, get healthy journey – do you still consider yourself “fat”? Was there a point when you stopped feeling that way?


 I have lost 85 pounds and have gone from a super tight 22/24 W to a perfectly fitting regular size 14.  I totally still consider myself fat.  In all fairness, I’m still clinically obese, so from an objective standpoint, I am fat.  I am starting to really see the changes, so I hope to someday not have this feeling anymore.  Regardless, I feel better and I can do more.  So far, so good!

2. Tell us about your first kiss.

  Oh Lordy.  It was the summer between 7th & 8th grade and my parents got us a room at the Executive Inn so we could have a “staycation” and play in the pool.  I met a boy from the neighboring state who was about 3 years older than me and we pretty much spent the entire day kissing.  Ha!  We abruptly left the hotel later that day and I’m guessing I know why.  HAHA!   

3. Describe your parenting style (either current or what you hope to do or what you would do if you ever had kids)?

•  I can’t imagine havingkids at this point but if I did…  I would like to think that I would be the type of parent that is present for her children.  I wouldn’t want to completely lose all aspects of my life now, but I would want that child to know that they are important and totally loved.  I would want to be a parent to them and not a friend.  I would want them to be able to come to me with anything but also understand that actions have consequences. 

4. How would your best friend describe you?

  I wasn’t really sure how to answer this question and I was a little curious, so I asked my BFF.  She first asked if I needed it asap because she wanted to get it right. 
J  Here is what she said:
She is smart, funny and adventurous.  No matter the journey we always seem to have fun.  She enjoys travel, sports, theater and spending time with her family (just to name a few).  She is goal oriented and career driven.  She leads by example and is encouraging.  Friendships are very important to her and she’s very loyal.  She’s an inspiring cook some days, a fashionista other days, and can sit back and enjoy good television or read a fascinating book.  There’s isn’t a situation in Beth’s life that she will not embrace, conquer and learn from no matter good or bad.

I believe her perfect day would go something like this…….she would live in London, with her family nearby, passport up-to-date, next door to her favorite theater sitting next to a handsome smart man wearing adorable earrings and the cutest shoes thinking about the basketball (or football or Nascar) game she’ll watch when she gets home.
I’m not going to lie.  I had a few tears while reading this just because it is so nice to have someone know you so well (and still love you).  I have had some good friends and some not-so-good friends throughout my life.  But I have never had anybody like BFF and I’m so thankful she is part of my world.

5. Repeat question: Summarize your week in blog land and in real life.
Blogland – the two world collide this weekend as I meet Ronnie, trisha & Kecia on Sunday.  YAY!  It’s no secret that I love, love, love my new blog page.  :)
Real World – I’m loving my short hair and I’m eager to see how the tweaking my stylist does this weekend will make it look.  I’m looking forward to a get together with my college sorority sisters who I haven’t seen in 15 years next weekend!  Life is good.  So good!

HUGS!!

A Trifecta of A-HA moments and a couple of challenges.

I must have visited my blog page 50 times yesterday.  It is my new happy place!!  (Thanks again, Jen! <3)  So, each time I would see something new and feel good all over again.  But one time as I was scrolling down, the picture of me popped up that I took yesterday and for a split second, I didn't realize who it was.  And it wasn't because of the hair!!  I truly had not seen the total impact of my weightloss until that moment.  I knew I was smaller, but I just didn't see how much.  Man, that was a good feeling.  Total A-HA moment.

Yesterday, I had another 1400 calorie deficit.  I'm really proud of myself, because I just don't usually do that well.  I think partly I'm at MY sweet spot.  But also, I'm showing some will power that I never used to have.  Don't get me wrong...I'm on a 6 week challenge and I know that is making all the difference.  I won't be able to do this long term, but it is nice to take advantage of being pumped up and lose as much as possible.  Well...today the scale didn't move.  The A-HA moment came when I realized that I didn't care.  I know that I did what I was supposed to do.  The scale is either just catching up or will catch up later.  Either way, as long as I do what I'm supposed to do, good things will happen. 

I'm wearing my size 14 jeans from Cato today.  They are definitely not too big, but they aren't too tight either.  I had a thought that I should go to Cato and try on the size 12s.  Another A-HA moment came when I realized that I'm thinking about size 12s.  I have NEVER worn size 12 jeans.  EVER.  Now, I realize that they might not fit, however, to even be thinking about it is a really big deal.  YAY!

 As Spring comes and I want to start wearing shorter sleeves, I'm having a dilemma with my Body Bugg.  My upper arms and my thighs have always been my biggest problem areas.  I'm finally truly seeing them shrink and it is AWESOME!  However, now that my upper arms are getting smaller, the skin is getting quite saggy.  It isn't too big of a deal except my Body Bugg draws a lot of attention to it and squeezes it like a a sausage in a loose casing.  It is REALLY unattractive.  I don't think there is anything to be done.  I just have to keep working at it.  I'm not going to not wear the bugg...so there you go.

We are going to Babe's Chicken for lunch today.  They have AMAZING catfish and since it is Lent, my BFF wants to go.  I do too!  BUT, I'm going to have to be very careful to stay within my target calorie range.  My biggest worry was the biscuit.  Interestingly enough, as I was thinking about that, Debi emailed me and told me that someone brought a cookie cake to her office today.  We made a pact "no biscuit for me, no cookie cake for her."  Whew!  That should help a lot!

Happy Friday, Blogland!

Hugs!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Blogasm

Welcome to my new, gorgeous, perfect-for-me blog page.  Awesome Jen designed it just for me.  :)  Thank you so much, chica!! 

This was my reward to myself for reaching my most recent mini goal.  I'm now officially the lightest I have been as an adult.  Even though it isn't time for update pictures yet, I felt like I needed to take one!  I don't love how my hair photographs, but I know I love it in person so I don't care! 
I love mini goals because when I meet a goal (any goal), I feel such a sense of accomplishment and it makes me want to do more.  I have a mini goal AT LEAST every 5 pounds.  Sometimes less.  :)  For instance, I only have 1.4 pounds to lose to get to my next mini goal!  My next BIG goal (high school graduation weight, 100 pounds lost) is now 11.4 pounds away.  I basically have 5 weeks to get it done.  Still a HUGE goal...but right now, I'm feeling like I can get it done.

When I started my 6 week Swing for the Fences Challenge, I was inspired by Debi.  She just got a new Body Bugg and we were talking about challenging ourselves to meet an aggressive goal.  I told her that I would report in my calorie deficit to her everyday and (wow!) has it made me comptetitive with myself!  I mentioned yesterday that Tuesday was one of my best "plan" days ever and I ended up with over a 1600 calorie deficit (after working out twice during the day.)  Yesterday turned out to be one of the best non-workout days ever!  I ended up with almost a 1200 calorie deficit.  On a day I didn't work out?  That is unheard of for me.  I'm proud of myself today and I'm so pumped and motivated to keep going.  :)

Thank you cheerleaders!  You are helping so much, I can't even tell you.  I get my blog comments sent to me via email and those emails throughout the day just give me that little push I need.  Don't eat that snack.  Go work out.  Take the stairs. Make a better choice.  It means SO much!

Oh...I do have a confession to make.  We went to Olive Garden for dinner last night to celebrate Debi's birthday.  I had the chicken spiedini...have you all tried that?  It is 460 calories, I added a bowl of Minestrone which is 100 calories and I ate half of each.  A wonderful, DELICIOUS dinner out for less than 300 calories!!  After my leftovers were bagged to go and the bill was paid, I realized that since I had only eaten 1/2 my meal, I had calories to spare.  I could TOTALLY afford the calories in the Andes mint they give you at the end of the meal.  I started savoring the flavor.  It was SO good!  Like my eyes started rolling in the back of my head good!  OOOhhhhh chocolate is SO awes-  Holy shi*t.  Chocolate?  I can't eat chocolate.  I made a promise that I wouldn't eat chocolate for Lent!  My eyes got wide and I looked at Debi and immediately put the rest of the mint (yes, I was eating it in multiple bites...) on my plate.  I sat there looking at it saying...it seems a shame to leave it there after I already ate some.  Debi immediately snatched the plate, moved it to her side of the table and covered it with a napkin.  And that, my friends, is one of the many reasons that I think she is the BOMB!  I guess it was bound to happen, but it was an accident and it was half of an Andes mint so I'm not counting it.  Oopsie!!

After dinner we went to see Tommy Tune.  What a GREAT show!!  I was surprised about how much I enjoyed it.  Anyway, we learned something very important.  Never let someone take your picture from below you.  We are both WAY HOTTER that this pic.  :)

What a WONDERFUL day!  Happy St. Pats!  Hope you are wearing green.

HUGS & High Fives!!  :)

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Fine tuning my plan to meet my Challenge.

Day #8 of no chocolate.  I'm finding it MUCH easier.  Plus, now that I'm doing my Swing for the Fences Challenge, it is somehow making it even easier.  I had one of the best "plan" days that I've ever had yesterday.  I won't know my final calorie burn until tomorrow, but my food choices were great!  For me, anyway.

I typically work out during lunch twice a week.  I have found that not only does it help to burn more calories exercising, it is easier to provide myself with a low calorie satisfying meal when I bring it from home.  If you all knew me pre-surgery, you wouldn't know who I am right now.  I wouldn't miss going out to lunch for anything back then!  Before, it was my only social contact so I didn't want to not go.  But now replacing it with working out, is not such a big deal to me.

Yesterday, my godmother (who also works with me) and I walked around the lake by our office.  She & I work out together every Tuesday.  We decided that for my 6 week program, we would add Thursdays to our lunch workouts.  So that means that Tuesday-Thursday for most of the next 6 weeks, I will be working out and eating good, lo-cal meals at lunch.  That will really help with my challenge!

I would like to also add yoga in the mornings.  I just have such issues getting up earlier.  But I'm tentatively wanting to layer it in next week.  Of course, I have said that to myself about 15 times during the last year...  If I could get myself used to getting up a little earlier for yoga now, by the time it is light in the mornings, I'm hoping that I can get myself to run.  Baby steps...

Today is a perfect day for me to focus on my food choices.  I am not working out AT ALL which is unusual for me.  I'm meeting a friend for lunch and Debi and I are going to see Tommy Tune tonight.  I need to learn how to make the right choices without relying on reaching my calorie deficit through exercise alone.  Food is my nemesis and I will conquer it!  At least for 6 weeks.  :)


Hugs!!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

My New Challenge

I wasn't sure what I was going to post today.  I know that I'm excited to be ONE LITTLE POUND from the smallest I have ever been (1999).  I'm working on a reward for myself that I CAN'T WAIT to share with you.  But it is a surprise!!

Then I started chatting a bit with Debi and Amanda today and realized that isn't good enough.  I want more.  I want to get to my high school graduation weight and I want to do it by the time I visit my parents at Easter.

So I have 6 weeks to lose 13 pounds.  Obviously, it CAN be done.  But can I do it?  Here's my thinking... I'm already giving up chocolate during that time period, so I might as well dig in and make it a "Swing for the Fences - 6 Week Challenge".  Why not, right?  I don't know if I can do this, but one thing I do know is that I certainly WON'T if I don't TRY.

So, 13 pounds in 6 weeks means 2.2 pounds per week which means 7,595 calorie deficit per week or 1,085 per day.  That is doable!  My average calorie burn per day is currently 2,500.  I'm going to try and increase that to 2,700 but I'm still trying to decide how.  And I'm going to try and limit my calories consumed to 1,500 per day.  This is going to be my weakness for sure!!

I'm going to need some cheerleaders!  :)

HUGS!

Monday, March 14, 2011

No doc needed!

2nd post today, I know...  I have been having some heartburn the last couple of months.  Mostly, it would come on right after lunch and stay through the afternoon.  So, I had considered going to the doctor this afternoon for another little tweak out.  I kept putting it off because I "feel" like I'm at my sweet spot and didn't want to get rid of my restriction.

So, anyway, I'm minding my own business, eating some leftover tortilla soup (this stuff is EASY and DELICIOUS!) when my stomach starts growling so loud, I'm pretty sure the guy outside my office could hear.  Ha!  Anyway, that growl was the chicken moving through.  I think that I was getting a little stuck every day and that was causing the heartburn.  But now it has loosened up enough to let my lunch pass through.

I will be a little careful the next few days, but I'm glad that I don't think I need to go to the doctor!!

(Oh, and little note:  the hot guy that works out in the gym at lunch did a double take at me today.  I'm going to choose to think he was checking out the hot new girl and not wondering what the hell I did with myself!!  :))

Hugs!

I don't hate my face! YAY!

So, Saturday was the day of the big haircut...oooohhhhhh!  I took about 10 pictures with me to the stylist of short cuts that had caught my eye.  In my heart, I wanted the super short Natalie Portman cut, but I ended up being slightly too nervous.  Paige cut, cut, cut and in the end asked me how I was doing.  Of course when you get your haircut then styled by someone else, you hate it.  :)  But I was ABSOLUTELY prepared for that.  So, I went home and finished my day.

I woke up on Sunday, showered, blow dried my hair in 90 seconds and got ready.  I LOVED the hair.  The only thing I would change is that it isn't quite short enough on the sides!  I think that she left it long enough for me "to do things with it", but I would rather it just lay flat.  I texted her to move up my next appointment because I told her I wanted it shorter and she is just having me come in next Saturday to clean it up a bit.  YAY!! 

It's funny because I thought I wouldn't really like it.  I thought it would make me look masculine and fatter.  But I actually think I look thinner.  I have a neck.  AND a chin!  Who knew?  I don't know if this just really made me look at myself differently or if it made that much of a difference, but I just don't hate my face.  With makeup, jewelry and a pretty dress (that was too small last summer!), I feel pretty rockin today! 
Of course, I hate the pictures, but I'm not going to let that ruin how I feel about it!  :)

Tonight is support group which is always so AWESOME!  Plus I get to see my friend, Debi

Today is weekly weigh-in day and I have lost 1.2 pounds this week.  I would like more, but that puts me solidly in "good enough" territory.  I would like to have couple of "knock it out of the park" weeks in preparation for my trip to Indianapolis the last weekend in March.  I'm sure there will be drinking and not-so-good eating involved!

Happy Monday, y'all!

Hugs!

Friday, March 11, 2011

BYOC

In case you have forgotten, our good friend Draz provides us with 5 questions each Friday to help us get to know one another.  I had to pass on the XXX version this morning, but these I can run with.  :)

1.  If you were a salad, what kind of dressing would you want on you?
  • Hmmm...used to be that the answer would be ranch.  But now my tastes are changing so drastically it is hard to say.  So I will take the specialty of the house! 
2.  What is your quirkiest habit and how long have you had it?
  • The most OCD habit I have is having to walk back inside EVERY SINGLE MORNING to make sure I unplugged my flat iron.  It's not even borderline ridiculous...it is just plain ridiculous.
3.  If I looked in your fridge, what's the first thing I'd see?
  • Either a gallon of brewed tea (because that is ALWAYS in there) or leftovers getting moldy.
4.  Who or what inspires you and why?
  • I've actually been contemplating a blog post on this but I haven't really formed it in my head yet.  Many, many people inspire me and right now I'm getting the most amazing inspiration from the least likeliest places.  My parents, my family, my friends, my support group sisters, my fellow bloggers, my Jazzercise divas, random people on the street, everywhere!  Probably not a satisfying answer, but someday I will elaborate.  :)
5.  Repeat question.  Summarize your week in blogland and in real life.
  • Blogland - I've gone beyond blogland and graduated to email and/or Facebook with a few fellow bloggers.  I'm going to meet Ronnie and Trisha for lunch next weekend which is SUPER exciting.  I CAN'T WAIT for Chicago!! 
  • Real life - Other than the recurring acid reflux issues, my life is a bowl of cherries.  (Not quite as exciting as farting gumdrops, but it will do!  Ha!)  I seem to have a bit of a plantar fasciitis flare up so I'm going to have to baby that for a bit.  Bummer.  The chocolate standoff is going full steam ahead!
HUGS!!

FRIDAY!! WOOHOO!!

I'd been contemplating a couple new pages for my blog that I was going to do this weekend, but Debi and Lap Band Gal inspired me to get it done last night.  So my photos are out there for everyone to see!  But even scarier, my weightloss progression and goals are out there too.  As I said before, I have an aggressive summer planned, but really want to go for it!  I have dawdled around in Chubbyville for long enough.  I'm happy to be on the Onederland side of the tracks, but I want a house in Goaltown!  (Cheesy enough for you??)

I'm SO looking forward to meeting Ronnie & Trisha next weekend!!  I saw that Ronnie posted an open invitation on her blog and I'm hoping we have some joiners.  I LOVE new people!!  Of course, I can't post anything to Ronnie's blog right now because my high tech work computer cannot access Ronnie's blog (I can only see a snippet on my Dashboard.)  I also can't access others like DiZneDiVa, Midwest Meg, Sarah G...it is so bizarre.  Yet, many others I can access fine.  It's a mystery.  At least I can access from home...which is where I should be doing it anyway!!  So long story short (too late)...I'm excited to meet some fellow bloggers sooner than Chicago!!  YAY!!

Day #2 of my chocolate standoff was good.  I still wanted my treat after dinner, but that was the only time of day that it was an issue.  And again, I refrained from eating anything extra.  The last couple of days, without the chocolate, my calories consumed have really been down, but my calories burned have stayed the same.  I was kind hoping for a little jumpstart with some weightloss.  It IS moving though, just REALLY slowly.  That's okay.  Just want to keep moving and in the right direction! 

In the spirit of trying to meet my aggressive goals, I have also given up one of my creamers in the morning coffee.  I used to have two...now I just have one.  It is minor, but it is something.  This weekend is going to be a lot harder to stay away from the sweets.  Still not going to have chocolate (even on Sundays...I would just want more!) but I may have a treat or something.  I've been craving a Sugar Daddy, so maybe I will track down one of those!

Wish me luck on my haircut, y'all!  And have a spectacular weekend!

Hugs!! 

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Dreams, Chocolate and Interesting Dinners

Dreams
I had a dream that BFF, our friend Bike Guy, and I were standing in a field for some reason.  We were close to home and there were a lot of other people in the field.  I looked up in the sky and there were several helicopters.  One started nose-diving and crashed.  I sensed that another crashed behind me.  Then we see two other-worldly type of helicopters flying extremely low and headed our way.  As they got closer, I got more nervous and all of a sudden they pointed their "guns" on us which were some type of rays.  It didn't hurt but we could feel heat.  I instinctively dropped to the ground and kept yelling at BFF to move.  Then I woke up.  I have no idea what that means, but I dream about aircraft falling out of the sky all the time.  Dreams are odd.

Chocolate
Day #1 of my chocolate standoff went well.  The worst parts were breakfast and not giving in to my sweet tooth craving after dinner.  But I did it.  I wanted just a little something sweet right after dinner, but I didn't eat a thing.  Just my dinner then later a glass of tea and a 1/2 bottle of water.  And Mr. Scale rewarded me this morning.  YAY!  One day at a time.

Interesting Dinner
I've mentioned my monthly dinners (we call them Interesting Dinners) that I have with 6 of my closest girlfriends (one was missing this month).  Four of us started this group in 2004 and we have only missed a handful of months.  I never thought it would last this long, but I truly look forward to it each month.  This month, our newest member KK chose the spot.  We went to Smoke Restaurant at the Belmont hotel in the Oak Cliff area of Dallas.  The menu was unique and I love trying new things!  I got a rum cocktail which was pretty good and definitely STRONG!  I couldn't even finish it since I was driving home.  I also ordered the duck tamales with a fried duck egg.  It was YUMMILICIOUS!!  I should have taken a picture of it because it was a gorgeous presentation too.  I did take a picture of the group though.  These are my lovely friends:
I can tell I'm getting a little better with my self-image because even though I feel I look horribly awkward in this picture and I don't think it is flattering at all...I don't care.  It is still better than all the FAT pictures from last year!  :) 

2 days and counting until the haircut! 

Hugs!

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Apparently Chocolate Rules My Life

Today is Ash Wednesday and the start of Lent.  As you all know, I have chosen to give up chocolate for Lent.  Totally tough for me!  Well, I didn't start realizing how tough until last night.  Last night I remembered that (in addition to every dessert I love) BOTH my pudding snacks and granola bar snacks have chocolate in them!  Also, I often have chocolate creamer in my morning coffee.  That's when I realized that this doesn't just impact my after dinner sweet tooth.

That's okay, right?  I can have non-chocolate snacks.  I will just have to go to the grocery store tonight.  Today, might be a little tough, but I can eat my breakfast and...  Oh crap.  Yep, I just remembered that too.  My breakfast shakes are chocolate.  Of course they are.  Sigh.

Okay, I can do this.  I just ordered me some vanilla shakes.  I have some PB2 to add to them if I don't like them.  But for the 30 work days of Lent.  I can drink something different.  :)  Tomorrow & Friday I can stop by Smoothie King on the way to work and get something or maybe I will eat some yogurt instead.  But the point is, that I can figure this out.  Chocolate WILL NOT BEAT ME!

Today, breakfast will be an almond granola bar and coffee.  I'm planning to get a little bit of egg salad from the deli downstairs for lunch and I will eat that with some cheese and crackers.  After Jazzercise tonight, I will stop at the grocery store and stock up on some non-chocolate snacks.  What are your favorites?  I need some good ideas.

You know, I'm really glad I did this.  I didn't realize how much chocolate was ingrained in my day to day life.  I think it is a good idea to weed it all out and start fresh.  :)

3 days and counting for the haircut.  Still not sure, but I think I'm getting closer to my decision on what to do.

Shout out to Kerri and Nikki.  No real big reason...just because they are awesome!

Hugs!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

My Life, My Power

Happy Mardi Gras!

Mardi Gras today means Ash Wednesday tomorrow and the beginning of Lent.  I have committed to giving up all chocolate and weekday evening sweet treats throughout Lent.  I typically have a little chocolate something after dinner each day, so it is definitely going to be something I notice.  For me, the point of whatever I decide to do for Lent should help me strengthen my relationship with God and be beneficial in my quest to achieve my life goals. 

Giving up chocolate sounds like such a trite thing.  But really, for me, it's not.  I eat chocolate everyday.  EVERY DAY!  Not a lot, but something.  At those times I normally eat chocolate...for 40 days, instead I will pray.  I know that isn't for everyone and I have no problem with that.  But my spiritual journey has gotten me to the most AWESOME place I am today and it is the right path for me.  I do not preach to others on what they should do, but I stand strong for what is right for me.  (I don't talk about God a lot, but it is kinda the theme of Lent. :))

Also, giving up chocolate (and not replacing it with high calorie other sweets) will help me in my weight loss goals.  I love chocolate, so I'm not going to give it up for good.  But I added up approximately what I think I spend in chocolate calories over 40 days, and I think if I give it up (and don't replace it with other things), I will lose an additional two pounds. 

Yesterday, I realized that my friend and I were planning to go to an event on Friday...a wine tasting at chocolatefest.  Seriously.  Obviously, I wasn't really thinking when I made those plans.  I LOVE wine, but post band, for some reason, I can't tolerate it.  Pair that with giving up chocolate, it doesn't really make much sense.  In the past, I would have modified my plans...meaning I would have said that I'm giving up chocolate for Lent except for Friday.  Ha!  But my friend and I agreed that my goals are important and we would cancel this time.

Honestly, I think a lot of this is me proving to myself that I DO have the power over myself to make the right choices and to be strong in my committments.  Starting tomorrow, we will see how it works out!

Now part of me wants to chow down on a King-sized candy bar today.  But I will settle for a small piece of King Cake instead.  :)

Hugs!

Monday, March 7, 2011

NSV

Two posts in one day! 

Drum roll, please...

When I walk, my legs no longer rub together!  **TA-DA**

Don't get me wrong.  I have a LOOONG way to go.  But I no longer hear that "swish, swish" sound as I walk down the hall.  And that feels GOOD!

Hugs!

I'm now a Mavericks dancer!!

Okay, not really, but I did dance at the Mavericks halftime show last night!  More about that a little later. 

I'm starting to come down finally from my start-of-the-weekend fabulousness high!  :)  I was waiting all day yesterday for magical things to happen to me since it was MY AMAZING WEEKEND.  They didn't...but it was still a wonderful day.  I thought it was too bad that I didn't get my haircut yesterday because nothing could go wrong during my Magical weekend.  Still haven't decided what I'm going to do about that.  5 days and counting!

So yesterday was a super fun day.  First, I woke up and weighed myself and I was still squarely in Onederland.  Whew!  Then all of our dancers met up an made our way to the American Airlines Center for the 12:30pm practice.  There were 275 Jazzercisers there!  This was our group right before we headed in to practice.
We were all still bright-eyed at that point.  Then we went to the arena floor and figured out all of the logistics of coming onto the floor, where we would stand during the performance and coming off the floor.  We also went through the routine detail by detail.  By 4:00, we were exhausted and ready to eat!  But first we had to get our group picture taken.  The official pic comes later, but this is the casual one we took.  I'm on the tips of my tippy toes!

Notice our fearless leader, 8 month preganant Kristi!  She taught class up until about a week ago.  My freaking hero!  Right in front of me is my BFF (Cori), instructor extrodinaire!  Some of the other ladies in the group I knew well and others I didn't.  We had a fantastic time and I hope to spend more time with them in the future.

We went a grabbed some dinner and then made our way back to the arena for the game.  We watched the first quarter and then went to line up.  The actual performance FLEW by!  But it was so much fun.  You can see a shaky cam video of our performance here.  At one point, I'm in the left side of the screen, just as they show Champ (the mascot) dancing with some of the girls.

All in all, it was a wonderful day and a fun memory!

The best news is that today, my official weigh in day, has me at 199.6! 

Hugs!!

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Seriously?? My life is unbelievably good.

When last I left you I was in some post vaction booking euphoria and dreaming about my trip to Long Beach to see my volleyball players.  I'm still ridiculously excited.  The tickets to the event aren't even on sale yet.  Ha!  Hopefully they don't change the dates!!  :)

Anyway...right after I posted my last entry, my boss made a visit to my office.  First, I got a bonus.  In this economy, anything extra is just awesome and this was more than just something a little extra.  I'm floored with the generousity of our owners.  As if that wasn't AMAZING enough, he told me to look closer.  I have been made a VP and an officer of the company!  Holy crap!  Hard to imagine, but in the non-blog world, I'm quite the functioning adult.  To me it came out of nowhere and I couldn't feel better about  the confidence our leadership has placed in me by doing so.  I'm honored.

So, that was amazing and just started off the weekend in the most stellar way!  If nothing else happened, it would make it one of the best weekends of the year...but that wasn't all. 

This morning, I woke up to this...
Seriously??  All that and Onederland too??  This has got to be one of the best weekends EVER!  My goal was to hit it today and I did!!

I told myself that when I fell below 200, my reward would be a running watch.  So, after Jazzercise (of course), I made my way to RunOn! and bought my new Garmin.  Now I just have to figure out how to use it.  :)

My next benchmark is to hit 196...I have never weighed less than 197 as an adult (post college).  Then 185 as that was my high school graduation weight and will represent 100 pounds lost.  If I can keep my focus, they will both be here before I know it.

Tomorrow is our big Jazzercise halftime show at the Mavs game.  Hopefully I will have some pictures for you!  My shirt is awfully tight, but I've decided that it is MY weekend so everything will work out fine. 

Hugs!!

Friday, March 4, 2011

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, & the Super-freaking-Duper!

The Good
You all have helped breathe new life into my self esteem.  Instead of picking at everything, I'm trying to look at the overall (really good) picture.  I'm fitting solidly in size 14s and L or XL shirts.  I'm quickly approaching uncharted territory and it feels darn good!  Thank you all for helping me navigate!

The Bad
Over my first year banded, I would get stuck, slime, PB...all that fun stuff.  I always knew right away when I wasn't going to be able to get something down.  As I start the second year, things have changed.  I rarely slime or PB.  I know part of that is better habits.  But I think other things have changed too.  Instead of sliming/PB, I get heartburn. I don't realize that there is an issue until much later.  Like Band Groupie, I'm very concerned about sustained acid reflux, so I'm keeping an eye on it.  Don't get me wrong, sliming was horrible, so I'm not sure this is a bad, bad thing.  But at least with my old symptoms, I knew right away there was an issue and I miss that.  We will see what other things change as I move along.

The Ugly
Darling Nikki (Chasing Skinny), you have been talking and I have been responding, but I obviously wasn't truly listening.  I have felt kinda crappy the last couple of days.  I wasn't sure why, but I was tired, had more heartburn than normal, I felt hungry more, etc.  So, not real SICK symptons, just crappy.  Last night at Jazzercise, I was telling BFF about it and mentioned that I might be a little dehydrated.  Second song into the class, I started to feel like something was poking me in the belly (below the band...more where my port is located) and I was feeling flush.  BFF is the instructor, and I knew running out in the middle of a song would freak her out, so I made it to the end of the song then rushed to the bathroom.

There was nothing actually poking at me, but the pain existed.  I was super hot and super cold at the same time.  Suddently in my obviously not-holding-it-together state, I thought that my port had come loose and was attacking my body from the inside!  I started having a panic attack.  I'm not even joking.  So anyway, I'm pretty good at mind over matter and I started to calm myself down and think.  I realized that I was REALLY hot, but I wasn't sweating.  Since you can normally ring out my shirts by mid-class (I'm a sweater), that was strange.  Then it hit me...I was TOTALLY dehydrated.  I immediately began to calm down and I drank a bunch from the water fountain.  I had to take a ton of breaks during the class, but I made it through.

I got home and drank quite a bit and felt SO much better this morning, I can't even tell you.  My new goal is to drink a bottle of water every morning on the way to work.  I will try and drink more as well, but that is an easy one to make sure I get at least a minimum amount in early!  That was a stupid way to learn that lesson.

The Super-freaking-Duper!
I love the USA Mens Volleyball team.  Specifically, I'm slightly in love with star opposite Clay Stanley.  (Pardon the 13 year old girl in me.  She comes out a lot.) 

I became obsessed during the 2008 Olympics during their gold medal run.  In 2009, we realized after the fact, that the team gets together each year for World League and World Cup play.  We missed some games not too far away from home!  So, in 2010 we kept our eye on it and went to Wichita for a couple of games.  We had SO MUCH FUN in Wichita and looked forward to going back this year.

Fast forward to last week, they FINALLY announced a couple of US host cities for this summer's games and Wichita wasn't chosen.  Bummer.  But Tulsa (even closer!) was.  WOOHOO!  But the games scheduled in Tulsa are the same weekend as our Jazzercise Vegas convention.  Damnit.  I was seriously upset!  Not that I'm not going to go to the Jazzercise convention.  It will be fun.  But to miss my Vball team???

One of the teams in USA's pool is Puerto Rico.  So I insisted to BFF that we were going to San Juan.  She mostly ignored me.  Heh.  I've been pricing tickets and it was going to easily hit a couple grand for us to go.  :(  Big fat bummer.  But I didn't lose all hope just yet.

Fast forward just a little more to yesterday.  I was listening to a CPE webinar (BORING!), so I was doing a little on-line research at the same time.  USA Volleyball hadn't announced anything yet, but the International organization FIVB had just issued a press release with all of the match information for World League play.  The final US city to host games was Long Beach, CA.  Crap.  Tickets to LAX are going to be just as expensive as to San Juan.  Why can't Texas host some volleyball??  Anyway, for grins, I checked it out and was THRILLED to find out that I was wrong.  Tickets are $99 each way.  And Travelocity had a package deal with a 4 star hotel so for $450 each, we have round trip tickets and FOUR nights in a super nice hotel in Long Beach!!!

If that isn't enough, 3 of my favorite cousins live in Long Beach and I'm going to get to hang out with them.  Everything just so fabulously fell into place and I'm so excited!  It will be a holiday weekend, so I doubt we do Disneyland or anything like that.  But there is SO MUCH to do in the area that I know we will have an absolute blast.  I know that I just spent a lot of words on getting to go to a volleyball game, but it just made my entire summer.  :)

Have a wonderful weekend, y'all!

HUGS!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Lent, Moms and Business Casual

Next Wednesday, aka Ash Wednesday, starts the Lenten Season.  I can't remember what I did last year to observe Lent, but I feel sure it was exercise related.  The two years before that, I gave up one night of television per week in favor of reading or doing some other productive task.  I remember how hard that was for me and now I barely watch TV since I'm trying to keep up with all of you awesome women!  This year, in honor of my new dedication to healthy choices, I'm considering the mother of all Lent promises...chocolate abstinence.  I've never considered this before, because (really??) 40 days without chocolate just doesn't seem like something God would want.  Anyway...I just need to make sure that I'm ready to do that and won't give up chocolate only to sabotage myself with Haagen Dazs Dulce de Leche or something.  I have a week to decide.  Do any of you observe Lent?  If so, what do you do?

My mom & I got into a little argumentini this morning.  Not a real argument...just an argumentini.  I love my mom beyond dearly.  Plus, she reads my blog so I can't gripe about her too much.  (Haha...love you, mom!)  Anyway, every morning she asks me how much I weigh.  I HATE IT!  I feel so much pressure!  It is totally self-imposed and I know that, but yesterday I asked her not to do it anymore and she seemed to be on board.  During a lull in the coversation this morning she said that the only reason that she "has to ask" my weight every morning is because I don't volunteer the information.  I had to laugh!  I tried to explain to her that my problem wasn't with her asking before I could tell her.  It's that I didn't want to pressure of "reporting in" every day.    She's kind of annoyed with me now.  :)  One thing I do know is that the second I see a "1" as the first number on the scale...there is no question of who is going to find out first!!

I had a little breakthrough moment this morning.  We usually wear jeans to work, but every once in a while when we want to put on a pretty face for an investor or something, we dress up to business casual.  Today is one of those days.  I have one pair of dress pants, size 16 NY&Co grey pinstripes.  I put them on this morning with a Nine West shirt I have had for several years (which just now fits) and a black NY&Co blazer.  Except for the fact that my pants are too big (I don't think they look too bad though and plus, too big??  super yay!), I felt like $1M.  The feeling has faded since, but it WAS there!  And if it was there for a little bit, it will come back.  I'm really working at this.  The makeup is helping.  I really like how it looks and so far I have been willing to get up the extra 10 minutes I need to do it.  That is a big step for me, people! 

I decided to take a picture for you all and I was kind of annoyed at my reaction upon seeing it.  Pick, pick, pick.  Ugh. I stepped back and took another look and it is a nice picture so I'm posting it.  Baby steps.
Still debating on what to do with my hair.  9 days to decide!

Hugs!!

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I love people! :)

BLOG:  I would like to give a shout out to one of my besties, Debi at Losing Weight and Changing Habits.  She is the awesomest!  We met at the Ft. Worth True Results support group and decided that we were friends from Day 1!!  She is a brand new blogger, so give her some love.  :)

SOCIAL:  Last night, I met my sorority daughter for dinner.  She is such an amazing person!  Because I'm a crappy sorority mom/sister, I completely lost touch with her after college.  But Facebook came to the rescue and it turns out that she lives in the DFW metroplex like I do which is AMAZING because we went to INDIANA STATE!  What are the odds?  Anyway, this is the second time we met up since reconnecting. 

Shannon has had some weight issues as well and that girl conquered the crap out of them.  That's not to say she didn't have struggles, but she crushed right through them.  She is gorgeous AND inspiring!!  Anyway, this time I told her about my Band and she couldn't have been more supportive.  I gave her my blog link so she might come by for a visit.  (Hi Shannon!)  I just love connecting or reconnecting with wonderful people.  I'm so freaking blessed. 

FOOD:  I had a good food day again yesterday.  My Low Carb Slimfast shake was fine.  Not awesome, but definitely doable.  So I will be saving 150 calories everyday right there!  Lunch was a little high cal (leftover chili relleno) but I also worked out at lunch.  YAY!  (Turns out my walking pace is 4 mph which is my former running pace.  Woohoo!!)  Dinner at BJ's was chicken lettuce wraps which according to online information were under 300 calories.  They weren't super filling, but it worked.  Plus, they were delish!

Poll:  what are some of your favorite low cal dining out options?  Since I can't eat a lot, it usually isn't a huge problem.  However, right now I'm really focusing on that target calorie defecit and I'm looking for low cal, yet tasty options while dining out. 

Some of my faves:
  • Chilis - 1/2 rack ribs (dry rub) and black beans.  (580 calories - and I typically eat 1/2 and take home 1/2 for another meal.)  I'm getting so much better with leftovers!
  • Chilis - Guiltless Grill Salmon & black beans (353 calories - I'm not as good with taking any of this home.)
  • Olive Garden - Grilled chicken Spiedini & Minestrone (660 calories - this one is good leftover as well!)
What are your favorite tasty, but healthy restaurant options?  Please let me know because I'm ALWAYS looking!!

BODY/SELF-IMAGE:  Okay, okay, I'm working on bettering my self image.  :)  It's funny because I have a TON of confidence for what is on the inside.  I just have to start matching it with what is on the outside.  Baby steps!!  I'm thisclose to Onederland.  If I can stick with my food focus and meet my fitness goals, there is no reason I shouldn't reach this goal shortly.  My goal is to meet it by Saturday, but I'm betting no later than Monday for sure! 

Plus, today I'm wearing size 14 Ralph Lauren jeans.  They were a splurge for me when Macy's was having a sale a while back and they finally fit.  It will be nice to leave my 16s completely behind (have never done that as an adult!) and move toward 12s (again...never happened.)  With y'all behind me, I know I can do it!!

HUGS!!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Month-end Update!

From the time I started my pre-op diet in January of last year until October, I had my ups and downs, but for the most part I did exactly what I should be doing and I lost 74 pounds.  In October, I lost another pound, but mostly I just maintained.  I got hold of the situation in November and lost 4 more pounds.  But then came December...my unfill, my tonsillectomy, the holidays, no restriction.  I was thrilled that I only gained 1 pound that month.  January came around and I was ready to refocus, but with no restriction and a slightly whiny attitude, I gained 4 pounds.  It's funny (and sad) though because I completely ignored it.  I didn't change my ticker or anything...just pretended it didn't exist.  I will not let myself do that anymore.  If I gain, it goes right up there for everyone to see!!

Then along came February...renewed restriction, new fitness goals and last week, new food goals.  I'm proud to say that I lost 9 pounds in February.  Four of those pounds were to get me back where I was and five of them are brand new!  :) 

Interestingly, 5.2 pounds of the loss came in the last week of February as I started my food focus.  Isn't that nuts? 

Most of me is happy to be on track again.  I am 1.1 pounds away from Onederland and it is totally possible to get there by the end of the week.  My reward to myself for reaching that goal is a running watch, so I would LOVE to go shopping for that soon!! 

But there is a small part of me (just a teeny piece) that is disappointed in myself.  Not for this month, but for the time I wasted.  I read about some people doing EVERYTHING they should be doing, logging food, eating right, working out, etc.  And they are still struggling to lose fractions of pounds.  Yet, if I just do most of what I'm supposed to do, I have FABULOUS success.  I feel guilty for having it easier and not taking advantage of it.  But the past is the past and I will move ahead.

Last notes for the month-end update:  I worked out 785 minutes in February which averages to over 30 minutes a day.  YAY!  I also lost another 4 inches, most notably an inch around the flabby belly and a half inch on EACH thigh.  NSV's: lots of random compliments about looking good (fun!) and no more sleep apnea (woohoo!!).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wanted to take a moment and thank you all for your kind comments yesterday.  While I don't think I'm ugly, I have certainly never thought of myself as pretty, etc.  That you all would say things like that brings tears to my eyes.  Thank you.

Also, I'm already starting to back away from the super short haircut.  I'm just afraid that I don't have the confidence to sell it.  Two weeks after the cut, I'm flying to Indianapolis to see friends and sorority sisters that I haven't seen since college.  I want to make sure that I'm at the top of my game.  The bad thing about a super short cut is that you don't know if you will love it until you do it.  But if you don't love it, it will take at least 6 months to get it manageable again.  I know it is just hair...but it does grow kind of slow.  :)  I still have a couple weeks to decide.  But I'm still doing the makeup!  I got a couple of WONDERFUL comments from people yesterday, so the makeup stays regardless of the hair choices. 

HUGS!!