From the time I started my pre-op diet in January of last year until October, I had my ups and downs, but for the most part I did exactly what I should be doing and I lost 74 pounds. In October, I lost another pound, but mostly I just maintained. I got hold of the situation in November and lost 4 more pounds. But then came December...my unfill, my tonsillectomy, the holidays, no restriction. I was thrilled that I only gained 1 pound that month. January came around and I was ready to refocus, but with no restriction and a slightly whiny attitude, I gained 4 pounds. It's funny (and sad) though because I completely ignored it. I didn't change my ticker or anything...just pretended it didn't exist. I will not let myself do that anymore. If I gain, it goes right up there for everyone to see!!
Then along came February...renewed restriction, new fitness goals and last week, new food goals. I'm proud to say that I lost 9 pounds in February. Four of those pounds were to get me back where I was and five of them are brand new! :)
Interestingly, 5.2 pounds of the loss came in the last week of February as I started my food focus. Isn't that nuts?
Most of me is happy to be on track again. I am 1.1 pounds away from Onederland and it is totally possible to get there by the end of the week. My reward to myself for reaching that goal is a running watch, so I would LOVE to go shopping for that soon!!
But there is a small part of me (just a teeny piece) that is disappointed in myself. Not for this month, but for the time I wasted. I read about some people doing EVERYTHING they should be doing, logging food, eating right, working out, etc. And they are still struggling to lose fractions of pounds. Yet, if I just do most of what I'm supposed to do, I have FABULOUS success. I feel guilty for having it easier and not taking advantage of it. But the past is the past and I will move ahead.
Last notes for the month-end update: I worked out 785 minutes in February which averages to over 30 minutes a day. YAY! I also lost another 4 inches, most notably an inch around the flabby belly and a half inch on EACH thigh. NSV's: lots of random compliments about looking good (fun!) and no more sleep apnea (woohoo!!).
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I wanted to take a moment and thank you all for your kind comments yesterday. While I don't think I'm ugly, I have certainly never thought of myself as pretty, etc. That you all would say things like that brings tears to my eyes. Thank you.
Also, I'm already starting to back away from the super short haircut. I'm just afraid that I don't have the confidence to sell it. Two weeks after the cut, I'm flying to Indianapolis to see friends and sorority sisters that I haven't seen since college. I want to make sure that I'm at the top of my game. The bad thing about a super short cut is that you don't know if you will love it until you do it. But if you don't love it, it will take at least 6 months to get it manageable again. I know it is just hair...but it does grow kind of slow. :) I still have a couple weeks to decide. But I'm still doing the makeup! I got a couple of WONDERFUL comments from people yesterday, so the makeup stays regardless of the hair choices.
HUGS!!
9 comments:
I know what u mean about the disappointment about wasted time. I was just talking to my husband about the same thing. I was up 4 pounds for the last three weeks and finallly took them off this week and was frustrated bc I could have been in onederland if I hadn't screwed off!
I so know what you mean on the disapointment level! And I always have to force myself to also remember how far I have come...And you have come so far!!
I was just there. I had the perfect fill all through at the end of October all the way through the end of December. I went in and got greedy and had him "bump it up" just a few cc's. In the process, I lost some fill and suffered drastically the month of January. I too feel I wasted so much time. I'm just now getting back on track and it feels fabulous. I can understand the feeling of disappointment; but you stepped right back up to the plate and are now back in the game. That's the winning factor! Good luck - you look great.
sounds like overall a great month
So glad you decided to keep up with the makeup, it looked great! :) I'm also happy you're not beating yourself up, especially since the gain is back off (plus more!) now.
I see people beating themselves up so much they actually sabotage MORE, it's really sad. I can't wait to celebrate with you when that one pops up in front of your weight! :)
I am a chronic self sabotager (?) and I know that everyday I could be doing better than I am - but I also know that this is about making changes for the long term and if I want those changes to become mainstream I need to take it slow.
Congrats on a great month!
My dear - if you think you aren't pretty - you're blind. I would never lie to you. That Jan 2011 pic is awesome. And 9 lbs in Feb - is freaking awesome. No regrets - just live in the now and make it the best now you can! Here's to a successful March!
Can I just say that I have been staring at your "current" picture on the right side of your blog.. and you look SO fabulous!! You are doing great, we ALL have bumps in the road!! Don't feel bad at ALL. Hugs!
It might feel like you've wasted some time, but in the scheme of things, you have lost so much weight in a short time. It took years to gain the weight - what's an extra month or to to lose it? You look fantastic! BTW - I have short hair - a few times I've wanted a change and decided to grow it out... it never lasts because I can't be bothered with how long it takes to dry and style. Short hair is great - 2 min (I do not jest) to dry it, and the same to put some product in and scruff it up. And, it still looks feminine. I recommend it!
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